Nifty 50!
Everyone kept asking me what Phillip was planning for my 50th. He’s arranged some pretty spectacular things for me over the years so I knew whatever it was I’d be thrilled. Our son captured the moment:
  
  
Good Lord! What could it be? Well, prior to opening this envelope, Phillip planned a weekend of delights including dinner at La Panetiere.
   
  
 
     
    
We visited the Cloisters on the northern tip of Manhattan overlooking the Hudson to enjoy the stunning array of more than 5,000 pieces of European Medieval works of art from the 12th – 15th centuries including the famous Unicorn Tapestries. The Cloister’s Library contains over 15,000 volumes of books.
  
  
Later, we toured the World of Wings butterfly atrium where I had my 1st opportunity to take photos with my gorgeous new Canon from my son. For the amount of time I invest in my photography, this latest Canon with touchscreen, image sensor & built-in Wi-Fi was the p-e-r-f-e-c-t gift!! Thank you, darling!
  
 
  
  
And if anyone knows our family well, you’ll know why the logo above is so significant!! 🙂
As you can s
ee, this day was magnificent with brilliant sunshine & deep blue skies. But 50 years ago, there was a blizzard and my mother arrived at the hospital with a police escort. That’s one way to make an entrance.
Mom recapped the story over dinner. Then she surprised me with a very special gift…a piece of jewelry I’ve admired for 45 years. It was given to mother by my father’s mother when I was 5.
I’ve worn it in the past with great delight (photo on right), but on this special night, my mother said it was now mine. Overjoyed is an understatement. It means so much to me on many levels.
 
  
 
  
  
So what was in the envelope in the opening pics? Let me first explain that my greatest gift ~ now & always ~ is being loved by my family & friends. Flowers & cards, emails & posts. All is appreciated. The kindness, the thoughtfulness, the time spent to make my day special. Thank you all!!
 
The above cards from my children touched my heart deeply. My son chose a card that says I make him feel understood, happy and loved. Wonderful, wonderful!! And our little one says I make her happy every day…down to even the school snack. What more could any mother want? Happy, thriving kids – this was, by far, the very best gift of all!!
  
    
    
        
     
   
   
  
 
  
16 years ago, I started the Harry Potter series with our son…reading it in “real time,” that is, waiting each year for another book to be published…standing in line at midnight openings with great anticipation for 1st edition hardcovers. We saw the movies, he had the posters, the comforter set, the throw pillows, the robe, Harry’s wand, etc. He even had a Harry-esque look to him, especially when he got his glasses.
   
  
  
Fast-forward more than a decade and our little daughter & her friends are relishing in the adventures, quoting the spells, whipping up potions and donning the robe. The perfect hardcovers have moved from our son’s room to our daughters’s bookcase. Over the holiday break, we watched all 8 movies (Yes, 8. The last book was filmed in 2 parts).
My friend, Sara, took one of our daughter’s best-est friends (since the girls were infants) to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter last month. The girls are now 9 & 10, the perfect age for the story. Sara posted this video of Platform 9 3/4 on her FB page & that was it!! What more fun could our family have than to venture through the fantastical world of wizards?
 
 
 
 
CoCo Key water resort & hotel:
 
  
We finished up the weekend celebrations with my favorite movie, The Scarlet Pimpernel, with Jane Seymour & Anthony Andrews. Luscious ~ Dreamy ~ Yum!
    
 
  
So many other details went into this weekend that I would just like to say thank you to my husband, my whole family and my friends for marking this milestone with great joy.
The Bright SpotTM Â – Thankfulness that my mother is feeling better, it’s on & off and for my birthday she was really “on!” Even sparkly! And thank you to all who sent wishes for a beautiful birthday weekend. So ready for this next great decade, bring it on!!
Stroke at 47!
An interesting turn of events 26 years ago would wind & wiggle and eventually lead me to my dream man. I lived in England with a woman who would not only become one of my very best friends in the world…like a sister, but who would introduce me to my husband. I am the Godmother of her sweet daughter (seen here in her arms which also happens to be her 1st birthday) and my sister is Godmother to one of her sons. I’m indebted to her forever for my amazing husband & darling children.
So when I received the phone call that she had had sudden hemorrhaging in her brain and was in the hospital’s acute stroke ward, we immediately booked a flight to England. As I stared out the window, I felt a rush of emotions & memories flood my mind.
I thought about the day we met under bizarre circumstances that led me to live in her house for 6 weeks; even though she had just gotten married.
It was supposed to be an overnight. Both she and her husband said I could stay as long as I’d like.
So I did.
   
I remember them taking me sightseeing around England (above: York) and 
I took them apple picking in Vermont (left), trips to the City, and tours through the colonial towns of Connecticut.
I remember blasting their stereo to my Madonna cassettes I toted to England in my plastic pink cassette case – it was the 80s, you know. They worked by day & I danced in long t-shirts around their house to Bon Jovi, Def Leppard and the Talking Heads.
I’d jog around their little village and chit chat with the neighbors, shop owners and the folks gardening along my way. By evening, I was all abuzz with the latest goings on.
Then back in the States, I remember the train ride to New York City to see a George Michael concert – gotta love those glasses!
And I was so happy my friend & her husband were there the night I earned the Miss Connecticut title heading to the Miss America competition & at the party for my parent’s 25th wedding anniversary.
I remember the excited but weary phone call from England the moment her 1st son was born…he’s now 22 and lived with us for 7 weeks this past year. I was thrilled when she requested I be there for the birth of her daughter. Long story for another day…
And after my dear friend suffered several miscarriages &
 was experiencing a very high-risk pregnancy, she still boarded a plane 
immediately to be by my side the day my beloved father died (click this link for pictorial: Daddy).
So there was no way I was not going to get on a plane as soon possible so I could hug a woman I admire and love so much.
………….Home with us relaxing             My friend, Goddaughter, sister & me in England
The Bright SpotTM  – Cherish those you love. Give all of your heart to those who love you. Don’t waste time with people who aren’t sincere. There’s an expiration date on life, don’t miss any opportunities to hug those you love.
Doctors say they cannot operate on my dear friend because the bleeding is too close to the stem and one wrong move would end her life. Later today she undergoes another MRI. Prayers needed. With 3 children and a great husband, she’s taking life one day at a time. Doctors say the best thing she can do now is slow down. Perhaps a lesson for us all…to slow down…look around & give thanks for who you have in your life. I am grateful to have such wonderful friends. xo~b
Reunited After 23 Years
Long before Facebook, Twitter, email, Smartphones & Androids, there was the regular land line.
I made a phone call to my Uncle in London that I was in Lancashire for the summer. “You must come and visit, we’ll pick you up.” He and my Auntie drove 4 hours north to get me. They had 5 girls and the summer was one I’ll never forget!
But, eventually, Autumn came and I headed back to the States and into my routine. Days turned into months and months into years. 
Before I knew it, 23 years had flown by.
In that time, my 5 cousins had married and everyone had moved, even their parents; some to other parts of London, others to California & Florida. 
I was reminiscing one evening about that summer and my son asked why I didn’t get in touch with them.
“How? We lost touch more than 20 years ago.” He asked me their names and worked his Facebook magic. I didn’t use Facebook at the time and was skeptical.
Within 24 hours, one of my cousins who had moved out West responded and we were on the phone for ages!
A short while later, our family was reunited in London with 2 of the sisters who had stayed in England. I was just bursting with joy! An event to remember forever!
The Bright SpotTM Â – Â I am so thankful to my Uncle & Auntie for making that visit one of the most treasured summers of my life. Interestingly, that summer would cause a chain of events that would lead me to my husband more than a decade later. Amazing how our lives are so intertwined then, now and always.
The girls now with their parents & one of my favorites of them when they were little. I love you all, my dear family!! xoxo
(Below) With my Uncle 23 years ago and Uncle’s portrait over my Cousin’s & my shoulder
Granddad with his Beloved Once More
It was a long 2 years without Grandma but she came calling for Granddad in his dreams this week.
He   He became deaf, and she turned blind just a few years ago, but they always sat beside one another for 60 years, and when she was gone, he lived in silence beside an empty chair in the den. Click here: Is This The End?
Granddad fell in love with Grandma instantly. She was engaged, but that didn’t deter him. He knew she was his only one and promised to love her till the end of her life. They married and he fulfilled that promise day after day.
He was determined like that. He fibbed about his age to defend his country in World War II saying he was 18 when he was really 16.
He was stationed in France, and worked as a specialist sending morse code messages when his communication’s truck was hit by a mortar and his arm was blown off.
  
           A female physician – rare to have a female doctor in the war zone in France at that time – sewed it back on…it functioned perfectly!
  
 
 
 
  
Â
  
Granddad was sharp as a tack with very dry humor. Once, he was in the hospital for a respiratory illness that required a chest x-ray. The doctor came into his room looking shocked. “I don’t know how to tell you this,†he said, “but you only have 1 lung and it appears where your other lung should be is a black mark that could be a tumor.†“Oh, that other lung shriveled up years ago,†Granddad answered matter-of-factly, “forgot to tell you.â€
Grandma & Granddad gave our little one Tidmouth Sheds for her train table. I put a photograph of them next to it so she could link that the gift was from them. I do that with many special presents so the kids know from whom it came.
Our daughter said she will never give up her piano from Granddad even if she plans for a grand piano in her future. “It will go somewhere special in my house and I will keep it forever!â€
Just as Granddads do, he was the explainer of all things.
 
 
No place was better than on Granddad’s knee…
 
                   …& on his back!
Or hanging out grabbing a drink at the pub.
 
Granddad slowly went deaf in his late years. Soon he could only hear female voices. Later, on the phone, he could only hear mine – high-pitched & loud, I’m told. But then came the day when even my voice was inaudible.
 
 
It was crushing for me because I like family to stay connected especially because we are so far away.
Granddad was 88 years old. He wasn’t on a computer. I immediately printed out this website and Phillip had it bound and we sent these 300 pages of family stories and photos to Granddad in book form so he could read them over time at his leisure and keep up with family news he could no longer hear. 
He was kind and sweet and dear and loving. He will be deeply missed by the family. But he’s in his beloved’s arms once again and that gives us great solace. 
The Bright Spot TM –  We did not lose Granddad, for someone is only lost if their memories aren’t kept alive. We’re a picture-snapping, video-taking, storytelling family, so Granddad lives on. Thank you for sharing his story.
It Would Be Our Honor
I answered my cell on a sunny Friday while I was upstate with the kids. “I’m going to marry my sweetheart on Tuesday,” said the voice. “I was wondering if you & your family would come and represent my family since I’m alone here.”
Incredibly touched, I said it would be our honor! And with that, we attended a beautiful wedding     4 days later. Our friend was from Haiti and his family could not fly in for the ceremony.
My husband was father-brother-friend all wrapped into one, our daughter was a flower girl & I took delight in capturing memories on film.
Our friend was marrying into a loving, close-knit family.
 
  
  
His bride was stunning.
 
His in-laws were welcoming & kind. And we were moved by the warmth & joy that surrounded all of us this beautiful August afternoon. May we all be so blessed to have such an affectionate family.
 
  
 
  
 
   
Â
The Bright SpotTM  - Blessings to you, our friend, and your radiant wife. Peace on your journey of life together. See update 2015 below 🙂 b~xoxo
It’s been a few years & look who’s arrived! The sweetest, darling little baby boy for this wonderful couple. Love those eyes, love those cheeks!
 
My Mom
Thrown off a Connecticut beach for wearing a bikini, my Mom still rolls her eyes at that story & declares the beach keeper a crazy man.
Coming from a country where they play volleyball topless on the beach, they were lucky she even wore the bikini!
My parents met one evening at a beach club & married 2 1/2 months later. 
So it was no shock when I announced I was getting married after 4 days. “You know when you know,” she said. 
Phillip & I married after only spending 46 days in each other’s company and she was right.
Mom loves to garden, paint, 
decorate & read, read, read! She’s like a walking encyclopedia.
She’s an incredible photographer, interior designer, writer & artist. I love her drawings, portrait paintings, and my favorite, this ceramic chess set she painted nearly 40 years ago.
Mom’s a fantastic cook and prepared wonderful, healthy meals for me the entire 9 months I was pregnant!! She made sure I had the best foods when I was a baby and did the same for my kids.
       
Mom & me 1960s             Little Petal & me 40 years later
    
 
  
        and, of course, she gave me my 1st chocolates & Easter goodies…yum!
**********************************************************************************************************************
Folks who’ve met my Mom totally love her. She’s funny, talks straight and is the life of the party. She smokes, drinks, swears and gambles. She doesn’t apologize for any of it. She lives life to the fullest beating to her own drum.
  
    
   
 
When she lost my father 15 years ago, it devastated her. Their love and building a life together for their children was unsurpassed. They were a team in everything they did.
        
 
    
  
   
   
  
My Mom’s parents absolutely adored her.
 
 
Those were some smoochable cheeks!!
    
   
                        
  
   Â
   
     
    
My mother grew up on the water (the Baltic Sea and with Aunties & her Mom above at their beach guest house in Pommern) and could out row anyone. When she was young, she liked to ice skate, bike, dance and travel.
     
      And she always loved animals!
Mom was always very close with her parents, as were we all.
 
My mother & father taught me I could be anything I wanted to be. They supported my achievements in school, my activities, Â Â Â 
my music, my whims & fancies, my travels, my moves around the country for my career, and my exciting year as Miss Connecticut & all the wonderful memories of representing my native state at the Miss America…
   
…including helping me pack trunks & boxes & shoes and shoes and shoes for the 2 weeks in Atlantic City for Miss America.
My Mom traveled with me to Vancouver to put me on a ship that circumnavigated the globe for 4 months. 
Mom – who saves everything – threw away my clothes after a week’s caving trip…they were really dirty for her to have thrown them out!
We traveled around Spain, Gibraltar, Barbados & Germany together & tons of other places. Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â (left with my sister)
Years later, Mom drove with my dog & me across the country & decorated a house I found for cheap…really cheap…only to find out it was a former drug depot…so I left the house a short while later along with all the painting, bordering, curtain-hanging and decorating she had done day & night the week she dropped me off for my new job.
       
Mom sewed countless costumes (above) for me and for my sister & my sister’s students.
    
Mom (her passport pic) Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â me (headshot taken by Mom)
She took photographs of my wedding in England when the photographer there slacked off and almost ruined the day. 
Phillip gave him an earful and my mother took the photographs and she and my sister created a surprise wedding album for me when I returned from England.
My mother also saved hundreds of newspaper clippings, magazine articles and memorabilia from my Miss Connecticut year and painstakingly glued them into several beautiful scrapbooks to cherish always. She did it for a year and I never even knew it. Another wonderful surprise. You can view some of the clippings here: Miss CT in the News.
She’s always there to goof around
 and she’s there for all the tears like when we just lost my Uncle recently. He is with Daddy now.  🙁  🙁
    
 
                                                (pregnant with my sister)
Mom has always been great at photography and even gave me her precious long-lens Canon in the 80s on the ship trip. A treasured item, so I was, indeed, very grateful.
She’s developed her own photography and taken headshots for actors & personalities over the years. Definitely helped save a bundle on my own headshots for TV over the years! Here are some snaps from Mom:
  
   
  
  
 
  
   
  
Â
Thanks, Mom, for making my life great growing up. Thanks for all you have done for me. I love you!
In tribute to her, I hope I captured my mother’s life in this pictorial. Please say a prayer for her. She had heart fibrillations recently and was rushed to the hospital. It’s been constant testing every day.
Seeing her weak & tired is unnerving. Fragile is not a word I would ever use to describe my mother. Sweet but tough, robust & resilient, soft-hearted but strong-willed.
My mother prides herself on honesty and has never lied a day in her life. She is someone you can trust. She loves her daughters, grandchildren and animals. And we all love her.
The Bright SpotTM Â – I believe in the power of prayer. Please pray.
Paradise for Families
Peace, tranquility, a vacation like none other Рclich̩ by no means! Let me explain.
We were looking for a family vacation & what we found was something above & beyond in Runaway Bay, Jamaica.
It wasn’t the cozy sleep on the flight 
or the magnificent sunsets or the spa on the stone jetty in the   <Caribbean Sea. 
It wasn’t the climb to the awesome 100′ slide 
or the fire-breathing master.
The FDR resort is an all-inclusive, 78-suite, ultimate family experience consistently rated among the best in the Caribbean. 
It is Jamaican-owned, Jamaican-operated with Jamaican restaurants so you get the true flavors of this beautiful, tropical island and its people.Â
It’s not an oversized resort with a Starbucks, Burger King or Payless Shoes. I didn’t leave the States to find a mini-USA.Â
What took the experience at the FDR resort to the level of “phenomenal” was an intrinsic feeling of being transported back to the days of summer holiday camps like Kellerman’s in Dirty Dancing. Everyone knew everyone at the resort, and if you didn’t, you were welcomed with warm smiles and a handshake.
I was stunned to find that families have been going there for 25 years. Folks e-mail each other dates of when they’re returning. Families plan around other families they don’t otherwise see but once a year. We’ve been e-mailed by guests – now friends – about the next holiday. Unless I’m visiting friends, I never go back to the same places on Earth so I can explore new territory. So I was intrigued when the 1st family I met said they had been coming for the past 10 years. “Why??” “You’ll see,” smiled the father. By week’s end, I was looking forward to re-visiting this very special & unique place.
The owner, Franklyn D. Rance, for whom the FDR resort is named, says he has welcomed repeat international families for 25 years, he has watched couples come when young Moms were pregnant, and then watched their children grow up year after year, and then watched those children marry and come back annually with their own kids. I’d never heard of such a thing; it was fascinating to me.
I felt like I was back in the 60s or 70s ~ where parents of other children cared for, bandaged up, and guided with love the children in their midst. If you’re 40 and over, you’ll know that comforting feeling – a mix of common sense, “old school neighborhood,” and family amongst friends. And all the staff members knew everyone’s name, had fun with the parents, and the lifeguard swam with the kids.
   
Frank was one of the original 3 partners to found “all-inclusives” 30 years ago. He and his partners built resorts throughout the Caribbean and, now retired, he enjoys his days at the FDR sitting under a palm tree with his advisors. He envisaged a 
relaxation haven for parents when he created the Personal Vacation Nanny service.
Each family is matched with a specially-trained, private nanny to follow, entertain, swim with, play with, keep safe and care for every need of your child or children so parents can completely relax – body & mind. Your personal nanny takes care of your suite as well, bedding, towels and even brings up platters of evening treats you request.Â
I wasn’t into it at first. I watch my kids. I play with my kids. This is family time.
Well…guess what…there’s plenty of family time and one can always play and swim with the kids, Nanny is there to assist from 9-4. She will run back to the room if you forget your sunscreen or hat, she’ll get a drink for you at the bar and, once I was completely comfortable and knew how happy my little one was with all her new friends and their nannies, I could actually take a romantic morning walk on the beach with my husband… or a little afternoon siesta…imagine that…on a family vacation!
We loved our nanny so much that we asked she bring her child to work so we could spend time with her 2 year old. Â 
We gave her a little dollie and hope she remembers us till we return. We love FDR. It’s not a mega-huge resort. It’s kid-friendly and families are welcomed back year after year with handmade signs on their door.
Another delightful and unusual thing about this trip was that each night dinner was served in a different restaurant, or on the beach or on one of the piers throughout the resort. Location & time were listed on the chalkboard by the pool. We didn’t get that at first and went downstairs when we felt like it for dinner. Everyone was finished and going to the dance floor area for entertainment. Whoa, what happened? Families came up and said, “Hi, we missed you at dinner.”
You did??
The next night we came down between the 6:30-9:00 time for cocktails on the pier and dinner. Everyone was there.
Children ran around & played and parents talked about their great day. Amazing! It was so delightful. So friendly. So engaging. So comforting. So not the era we’re all living in now where everyone’s consumed by their handhelds, Facebooking, texting, tweeting, blah, blah, blah. Here everyone was unplugged and relaxed – Eating together. Dancing together. Singing together. And, in Phillip’s case, entertaining us with some funky stick dance on his butt~! LOL! 
The trip was simply wonderful, rejuvenating & exciting. We enjoyed the resort’s glass-bottom boat, spa, our private wedding anniversary dinner with our 7 year old on the pier, 
the children’s talent show, the daily activities, the Rum treasure hunt at the bottom of the pool, board games, water trampoline, swimming with the dolphins & stingrays, snorkeling, diving and all the exciting adventures the Caribbean has to offer.Â
 
The Bright SpotTMÂ – It was hard to leave Jamaica but e-mails from other families we met there have been flying in: “When are you going again?” I can tell you it will be very soon. A real pleasure and, indeed, the ultimate family experience!
Â
Live & Let Love
I was finishing up a really great day trip with my daughter & one of her closest friends. The girls met more than 6 years 
ago in a baby lapsit music program. The little friend’s grandmother was with us on this particular day and my husband called to see when we would be home.             Â
“It shouldn’t be more than an hour now,†I said and we each finished with “I love you very much, too.â€
The grandmother turned to me when I hung up. “I didn’t mean to listen in but it was really nice to hear you talk like that with your husband.â€
To me, it’s just normal. My husband and I are tender & loving in our daily routine. It’s good for us & it’s good for the children. Affection is part of their daily life, and I hope that their partners one day in the far future are just as loving & warm.
I remember advice from some folks when I first married: “Don’t call your husband at work, just let him just do his job.â€Â “Don’t tell your husband you love him all the time, he’ll bore of you.†“And don’t be overly mushy, guys don’t like it.†
But I grew up in a loving home with smoochy parents & grandparents and I went with my gut. To me, men are just as deep as women are and most people, I believe, desire attention, recognition & hugs. 
And what I find is that many people wish they had a more loving relationship. Or that they connected more with their spouse.
It’s really not hard. It’s the little things that add up to the wonderful bond between you & your significant other.
A brush past your partner with a soft touch across the shoulders. A little kiss as you pass in the kitchen or while your husband is working late into the evening. I leave him notes in his briefcase, he’s left me notes in the pantry, across my computer screen, in my coat pocket or the bottom of a soup pot! 
Arm in arm when you walk, hand holding when you talk, a little text here & a little Google Chat there. It all adds up. Communication – touch, voice, writing – text or by hand. It all matters.
And nothing beats the kiss!Â
 
Don’t think your kids don’t notice. They want that comfort of a loving environment.
Of course, when they’re preteens, a kiss might evoke a look of disgust or even a groan, but in reality, it gives your children quiet inner peace to know their parents are close & loving and, with a divorce rate of nearly half of all marriages nowadays, don’t underestimate the great security it gives them. 
So reach out to your partner. Physically & emotionally. And have fun!   
It will not only be super for your relationship, but it will teach your children what a loving family is and what a great partnership looks like.
And the kindness your children experience they will share because they know it as their norm.
  Â
The Bright Spotâ„¢ 
 – You already know your children model your behavior.
You have the power to mold their framework for a loving marriage and a connected family structure in their future. 
 So go on now…smooch the daylights out of your kids and your spouse! Happy Parenting!™
Our World Community Comes Together!
Born & raised in picturesque Connecticut just 30 minutes from Newtown, I was devastated to hear the news on December 14th. I sat in church longing for words from our clergy to help make sense of the tragedy. My heart was so heavy, my eyes and cheeks burned with tears for the parents, siblings, grandparents and friends who lost 20 of America’s babies and 6 heroic adults that fateful morning.
Christmas was about a week away and the kindly folks of that small, beautiful town felt grief beyond measure. Understandably, the holiday lights remained unlit.
Our church held several prayer vigils for the victims & surviors that horrific night, the very next morning and throughout the week. A Christmas concert had been planned for later that week and the question came up, “Should it be cancelled?” I and the rest of the congregation were so heavy-hearted. I expected the pastor to say it was cancelled.
But instead he said, “If we do not sing, evil wins. If we do not help our community move forward, we lose. If we do not light our 
trees and our candles, evil wins. If we do not help others to start healing, we lose.” “Arise, shine; for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord is risen upon you!” (Isaiah 60:1)
The Litany: “I live, at times…grieving the loss of loved ones…” “Oh Lord, You are my Light! Come, dispel my darkness!”
Closing Litany: “If we walk in the Light, as He is in the Light, we have fellowship with one another…”
A fellowship from around the globe! Calls poured in from our grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends shocked by the news. The world community mourned the little children & brave adults all together and everyone’s wishes for strength, love, healing and comfort are flooding the families in Newtown.
456 children attended the school. There was only 1 homicide in that charming, rural town in the last 10 years. The parents will need help. The siblings will need help. Not talking about it to trusted friends or professionals could repress feelings and cause future problems. Many may feel “Survivor’s Guilt.” This tragedy has hit many adults and children in many parts of the world. We had a friend whose 8-year-old son didn’t want to go to school. Children need to feel safe. Parents need to address this in age-appropriate terms and only you, as a parent, know what your child can & cannot handle informationwise.
Phillip & I wanted to do what we could to help promote healing. We asked family therapist & trauma expert, Melissa Cook, to speak on our Live call-in radio program, “Let’s Talk!” on 1490am to give specific advice on steps families & individuals - directly & indirectly – could use to start to heal and repiece their lives. All shows are archived on this site, just click here:
Pumpkin Henge
“Do you smell that, Mommy?” I wasn’t smelling anything, I was heading into
Party City for a dolphin balloon, last errand of the evening, my mind racing with the day’s events. “Smell what, Honey,” I asked, clutching her little, warm hand in mine as we weaved through the busy parking lot.
“Autumn.”
I stopped immediately between the safety of parked cars and looked at her. “What do you smell?” She looked up at me and then closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “The smokey smell in the crisp air, that smokiness you smell when fireplaces crackle and leaves fall gently outside and we get costumes for Halloween and then the holidays begin!” Then she opened her eyes and smiled serenely.
What a simple delight when we stop everything and listen to our children. When we halt our harried lives and smell the air around us. Yes, just stop and breathe. 
We took the kids to a 150-year-old farm for hayrides & pumpkin picking, corn mazes and strawberry fields…forever…
  
 
The girls worked hard creating their very own Pumpkin Henge: 
After 20 years, I’m turning in my Marilyn outfit to match our daughter as “princess & queen”
as we help coordinate this year’s Fall Festival and organize the costume parade with Batman.
Oh, I do love my Batman!  Click here for more about my very own Caped Crusader: http://theletstalkmom.com/tea-talk-momversations/my-caped-crusader/
The Bright SpotTM Â Â – It’s not just roses we have to slow down for, smell the Autumn, too. 🙂 
Which One Are You?
Janet Jackson’s catchy tune “What have you done for me lately?” and John F. Kennedy’s famous quote from his inaugural address, “…ask not what your country can do for you — ask what can you do for your country,” can symbolize your view of a relationship. Where do you fall in your marriage?
For us, we try to do whatever we can to please one another. If I grab a bottle of water for the car or our room for the night, I grab one for Phillip, too. It’s not even a thought, it’s just automatic. And it goes for anything. If he makes a cup of tea, he always makes two. If I can make my husband’s life more comfortable with simple, loving gestures, I do. And vice versa.
Sometimes I’ll warm a towel or his robe in the dryer for him shortly before he steps out of the shower, or I’ll chill a wine glass in the fridge before he comes home from work. These aren’t hard things to do, they don’t take effort, and are so appreciated. My husband sometimes leaves little notes in the big soup pot that say, “I love you,†and I leave naughty notes in his briefcase.Â
I learned very early on in our marriage that Phillip was a giver and a pleaser, and it made me want to do things for him in return. And so it went back and forth, back and forth. Now that’s a relationship cycle one would want to keep going!
Years back when I was about 20, there was a significant holiday – I can’t remember which one at this point – but I bought 
two cards and gave one to my grandmother and one to my grandfather. My grandmother smiled at me tenderly as she gave her card back. She put her arm around me and said, “Your grandfather and I are one; we share everything. We love your thoughtfulness, but we only need one card.†Then she kissed me on the forehead and that was that.
Married 61 years, they were loving and kind to each other every day. They held hands when they walked, when they sat on the couch, whenever they could. The memories are beautifully indelible. Their diamond celebration story: http://theletstalkmom.com/romance-and-spice/the-diamond-celebration/
So as I went into my marriage, I thought to myself I could think, “What have you done for me lately?†…or I could be a thoughtful spouse and say to myself, “What can I do for my husband?â€
I know there are some people that might think I’m a wimp. Oh, contraire! When you are great to your significant other and your significant other is great to you, you are united, you are strong, you feel loved, and you are on the 61-year path.
The Bright Spotâ„¢ Â – When parents are strong together, the whole family benefits and thrives.
Â
