20th Anniversary

Happy 20th Anniversary!
These photos are of our weddings in England & America.

They were 4 weeks apart both under a full moon.

In the last group of photos, there’s a picture of us today. 

For more on the English wedding, click here: Castles & Vows

Since my beloved father had passed away suddenly the previous year, my husband’s wonderful father walked me down the aisle in England and my father’s best friend, Prince Abdul Ali Seraj, walked me down the aisle in America. My sweet dog, Moussie, with his huge white bow led the way down the aisle!! And I love how Moussie’s standing next to me in the above picture!

For the story on this amazing dog, click here: Moussie

I had wonderful bridesmaids at the English wedding & the American wedding and, of course, the best maid-of-honor, my sister! Most bridesmaids flew back and forth. Look closely and you’ll see my sweet furbaby, Moussie, sitting on the grass with his big white bow in front of the blue dress!!! 

Then & now….photo from today. *Poof* ~ 20 years flew by!

I had my bouquet designed after my mother’s bouquet. I’ve gazed upon my mother’s wedding portrait since I was a baby. It was something to love and cherish and admire. She had natural stems and a huge red bow, biggest I’d ever seen. She cradled the bouquet in one arm. I brought a copy of her portrait to the florists in England & the States for both weddings.

                  

The Bright Spot – Love. I love how my mother looks at my father devotedly. She adored him. He was her one and only and she’s lived these 21 years alone since he died but she keeps his memory alive always talking about him when we’re together. It’s sad and beautiful at the same time.

My husband and I have been through a lot these 20 years. Of course, I appreciate all the blessings of our wonderful family, especially my children, and the life Phillip and I have created together. 

But there have been many tragedies – 5 miscarriages, Phillip’s aggressive Stage 4 cancer (click: The Good, The Bad & The Spicy), loss of our company in the deep recession, other complete miseries throughout the years, and now the weird lightning bolt that took out our well pump the day before our 20th Anniversary costing us $3,700 wiping out our summer vacation fund for the vital rest Phillip needed since he missed vacation last year because of more cancer treatments.

So you can imagine how thoroughly touched I was when a friend through Facebook whom I’ve never met but mutually feel kinship toward for an assortment of reasons including the fact that she loves animals and is just simply amazingly kind, wrote this: 

Wow! Truly, Liz captured the essence of these two decades. Thank you, Liz, for your kindness toward us, animals and all whom you serve.

1st Literary Award

Our 11-year-old earned her 1st Literary Award in a competition she entered months ago. She submitted a mini version of her 1st novella. It’s the 38th year of this competition & is open worldwide.

When Phillip read us the letter aloud, she jumped with pure delight feeling the fruits of her accomplishment after having spent months writing. We are so happy for her and very proud of her!

Castles & Angels

This gorgeous English countryside was captured on my cell phone! Breathtaking. Lush. So British.

During our 2-week trip to Europe to visit family, we went with some good friends to Northumberland. The girls loved that parts of Downton Abbey and Harry Potter were filmed here at Alnwick Castle.

 Lots to do here including bamboo mazes, ventures through the magic fairy gardens, the famous Poison Garden and, of course, flying broomstick classes!!

  

  

 

On our way back to Grandma’s, we pulled off the highway to see the Angel of the North, a massive copper & steel statue in Newcastle Gateshead, believed to be the largest angel sculpture on the planet. The wingspan reaches wider than a jumbo jet and the angel stands 65 feet high, more than 4 double-decker buses! We’ve seen her on the hillside from the highway for over 15 years. This ride home, we actually pulled off the exit and made time to visit. Those are the life-changing things we have found we do facing this awful journey of cancer, click: Kicking Cancer!

Yes, actually seizing the day and doing what we wish at a moment’s notice because no one knows how many moments we all have.  More than 150,000 people visit each year. This year, we’re one of those people.

 The Bright Spot – Visiting family & friends…and pulling off the highway to really seize the day!!

SeaTrek – Fueling the Passion

I have written many stories about fueling your child’s passion. Offering many opportunities for your kids to explore what it is they really love. For our son, it was photography & cars. Next month, his photographs will appear in an international car magazine!

For our daughter, it’s music, writing, animals & marine life. If you scroll through my archive, you’ll see many stories about her special beluga, swimming with dolphins in Jamaica, Florida & in Bermuda training 9 dolphins for a full day – gating, feeding, measuring, exercising & frolicking with these sociable, small-toothed whales, click: Favorite Day.

So when in England we heard about SeaTrek – known as Europe’s 1st Sea Bed Walk at Sea Life – we made sure to book it! The staff said they’ve never had a more enthusiastic participant!  We’ll let the photos & 8-second video speak for themselves. 

   

Our 11-year-old loved the sting rays, sea turtle, gorgeous fish, urchins, simply everything!

   
When I say we have a budding marine biologist in our midst, I think one might agree.

  

 The Bright Spot – Oh, just everything about this story. Empower your kids. Fuel their passion. If you are in England, enjoy SeaTrek by clicking Sea Life to get more information: Sea Life.

Everyone Needs Their Mum!!

We had a 2-week window between Phillip’s last chemical injection and the start of his radiation. It will be 40 rounds of daily radiation from June through August. He wanted to see his Mum. Click: Amazing Grace. Everyone needs their Mum at a time like this!

So we took our little one out of school late May/early June for this family emergency and visited relatives in Europe. Aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews, Godchildren, close friends, everyone we could see within 2 weeks.

Phillip’s mother was overjoyed! Her 89th birthday was in June and she said seeing her son was the best gift ever!

Naturally, everyone we saw wanted to know how treatments were going. We could not rehash the details over and over. Not only is it draining for us but we didn’t want these conversations to overwhelm or frighten our youngest. Most of the time, we can shield her from it but when you’re traveling from home to home – or pub to pub, as is the case in England – folks want to catch up and we’re very sensitive to little ears in range.

Plus, we have striven to reclaim normalcy in the household & beyond for our family. Playing with friends & doing cool things was a mainstay.

      And Legoland was awesome but laying on the grass topped all!! Why? Because there are no ticks or pesticides for ticks at all where Grandma lives and Darling was so happy!! It’s the little things, isn’t it?

 While staying for an overnight with dear friends about a hundred miles south of Scotland, we ventured with the girls to a nearby castle where parts of Harry Potter & Downton Abbey were filmed, click: Castles & Angels

Later, we drove nearly 300 miles south to Oxford to visit the university and delve into the history of this beautiful medieval city, click: Oxford 

And because our budding marine biologist, during these 2 weeks, would unfortunately be missing a highly-anticipated field trip to the beach to explore the biodiversity of the water’s ecosystem, we wanted to do something special for her and booked her for Seatrek at what’s known as Europe’s 1st Seabed Walk: SeaTrek

Her 5th grade teacher kindly allowed our daughter to give a full presentation to her class on the 3 adventures above & what made each so special.

And speaking of 5th grade, the Friday we left for the airport was the same day her class was split into just girls/just boys earlier that morning for “The Talk.” You know the one. Menstruation, growing bodies…

But unlike the lecture we had in school when I was that age – along with a cartoon movie with dancing flowers depicting our blossoming into young ladies – this talk was not only about girl stuff…but boy stuff, too! Would be shocking, but the school explained that with the advent of the Internet, kids see much more than we did at this age and need to know more material to educate and protect themselves.

Humm… Still found it shocking. But it certainly made for fits of laughter – of which we need much of these days – and especially with a silly 5th grader! as we passed by unassuming pubs like the Dandy Cock, or were served Nobby Nuts (salted peanuts) or when we read Spotted Dick on the menu – a British sponge pudding made with raisins & served with custard – but I mean, seriously, come on!

 

When we all revived in the car from laughing so hard, we arrived at one of Phillip’s oldest friend’s for a lovely meal. No, not at the Dandy Cock. We walked over buttercup-covered hills and along lakes & clifftops.

 

 

The Bright Spot – finding the hilarious things in life out of the simplest moments! And appreciating the glorious countryside with our loved ones.

 

 

 

 

Oxford

During our 2-week stay in Europe, we visited the medieval city of Oxford, coined the “City of Dreaming Spires” by poet Matthew Arnold.

Our 11-year-old daughter & I just finished the 7 books by C.S. Lewis, The Chronicles of Narnia, & the epic trilogy, His Dark Materials, by Philip Pullman, both alumni of Oxford University, the oldest university in the English-speaking world, established 1096.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What was completely remarkable was that there was only 1 parking spot available in this bustling college town when we arrived and it just so happened to be in front of the Eagle & Child pub – we were hungry, but we didn’t know how significant the place was until we walked in!!

Built in 1650, this favorite watering hole was frequented by Lewis, Pullman, J.R.R. Tolkien and other members of “The Inklings,” the famous literary group!

So, of course, that’s where we had lunch!

Seriously, out of the whole city, what’s the chance of finding that one parking spot!

 

 

Our daughter, a published author & speaker by age 8 and now a prolific writer working on her 1st novel, felt the wall behind where we sat and breathed, “I’m touching history.”

Couldn’t be more perfect!

 

 

 

She ogled the Harry Potter Golden Egg in one of the store windows but opted for the snitch.

 

 

 

Before leaving historic Oxford, we stopped for tea & scones and some lovely smoked salmon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Bright Spot – Being surrounded by spirituality, architectural magnificence & educational brilliance, it was nourishing for our well-being at this most challenging time: Kicking Cancer

My Caped Crusader

Whether my dear husband is busy

at Gotham City’s Sherry-Netherland’s Doubles on 5th Ave sweeping ladies off their feet…

                                              

or me off mine…   

… giving speeches 

or playing Cricket…

 chillin’ or racing 

giving sweet baby kisses

             

and super Daddy hugs…

 

   

  

 

 …corporate by weekday and

Hearth Warrior by weekend

  

(God, I love those legs!)

…and whether he’s playing peacefully or keeping the peace,

 

up in the sky or under water,

   

dressed up…

         

dressed down, OR…

     

barely dressed…

  

Phillip is funny and

 

  

great fun to be around.

    

A wonderful father,

  

an animal lover and protector,

  

a loving husband and great friend to all who know him, I am proud to be his wife, his lifelong partner, his other half.

   

I’m also proud to work together as co-hosts on our Live radio show, “Let’s Talk!” about Life, Love and Parenting archived on this site after each show for your listening convenience.

 

The Bright Spot  – I could not think of a better person to take this life journey with! Take a moment to think of all the reasons you love your special someone and go give that person a big kiss! I’ve just finished this story and am looking for my Batman, my Caped Crusader, my darling to give him a big smooch!  😉 b

Questy

Following the market crash & recession, we lost everything. Our cars, jewelry, livelihoods, even a 4^th miscarriage. It was a time of great loss. 

To say it was a bleak period is an understatement.

Even our award-winning vintage Adenauer, in the family for over 30 years, was shipped back to Europe as our hearts sunk.

 

We ended up with real clunkers & a car with water damage just to get around. THE very 1^st step to rebuilding our lives was the arrival of this magnificent surprise – rolling in sleek & gleaming…and best of all – smelling clean!! She wasn’t new but she was mine – shiny & safe for the kids!  See 1-minute video below:

A polished Nissan Quest that could hold 6 kids on trips to the beach, playground, anywhere. I was in Heaven! And how perfect – Quest – by definition, a journey, trip or expedition.

Very soon after her arrival, she earned her name Questy from the kids and referral by the feminine pronoun “she” like a ship. After all, she is like a rocket ship, spaceship, voyager. Even her navigation symbol looks like the red Rocket from Little Einsteins, a big hit when the kids were pintsized. A gliding tinted mini spaceship on wheels.

I was super thrilled & still am these 200,000 miles. From toddlers to teens, we’ve had the best of times cruising around to wonderful places. A memory-making kid mobile filled with music, movies, laughter, kittens, puppies & dollies. Perfect for luxurious travel with adults or sparkling with the happy vivacity of kids. 

     

   

  

   

  

                   And on occasion, Batman ditches the Batmobile to cruise in Questy who comfortably accommodates his signature cowl with the pointy ears!

Questy came with 5 sunroofs, 2 TVs, an awesome sound & DVD entertainment system, drilled performance rotors, run-flat tires, Bluetooth, comfy 2^nd row leather captain’s chairs and 65 other amazing features that would bore you if I listed them. You can look them up online.  

Oh, seriously, how could anyone be this excited about a minivan? Well, I was because there’s so much more to the back story but that’s for another time.

Ultimately, she’s trustworthy, reliable, great in the snow, with a super-sized, mega-view windshield, just an amazing vehicle all around with her airy cabin, polka dot rear cameras & rounded design, nothing boxy like a regular van. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And believe me, I know what I love in a vehicle! I’ve enjoyed wonderful cars throughout the years ~ my 1^st car at 16, a new Camaro Z-28 in sparkly midnight blue with a t-top & the coolest silver seats. Then my 1^st stick-shift 2-seater, a zippy MR2, followed by Mercedes’ in white, slate grey, black, ivory, green, maroon, champagne and even matching silver, BMW & Bentley Mulsanne. Questy floats like the Mulsanne.

      

 

And the lovely painted license plate, a gift from the Mayor of Wolcott, during my year: http://www.theletstalkmom.com/missconnecticut/ 

 

  People often ask how do I keep her so clean? It’s pretty easy really; I just ask the kids any time they leave the car to grab an item on the way out. And for wet skiis, sandy beach suits, muddy gear, I line the back with a large thin plastic party table cloth from the dollar store. A $1 covering in a pretty color, perfect. I keep a supply in the trunk.

And for Mother’s Day, I know a lot of women who might prefer Springtime flowers or a lovely luncheon. But my husband had something custom made for Questy – these gorgeous honeycomb mats ~ and I love them!!

 

The mats cover every part of the vehicle wall to wall, back to front. Love!! Perfect for this floating Goddess of the Road! Every inch of comfort is a necessity when you sit in the car as much as I do…nearly 200,000 miles…most of it waiting for kids to finish up school or heading to piano, track, ballet, summer camps, tennis, swimming, beaches & playdates and, with our youngest, countless hours back & forth to NYC for her career.

Questy is a rolling office, a spacious mobile command center loaded with every convenience from hot spots & Netflix to laptops, Smartphones, chromebooks, backrest Ipad holders, charging stations, you name it, she’s got it. The kids have been enjoying the space & amenities for years. Here are some pics of our daughter from 1st Grade, 4th Grade, and 6th – 8th Grades using these long commutes to complete homework & even write an award-winning novella. And, of course, Skyping with friends. I love the photo with the Intrepid in the window. In the night photo, she’s taking a class with a teacher via Facetime!!!

     

  

         

Um, yeah, that’s a ship surrounded by wild kraken in her hair ~ a cool October photoshoot with the amazing creative team of The New York Times.

With her many skylights, Questy is always bright & cheery even on rainy days.

I snapped these beautiful raindrops recently. They don’t even look real!!

If I won the lottery, I would have the entire engine & undercarriage made brand new so her odometer read “1.” I would also buy a new driver’s seat because 6 years ago I watched a <<mechanic swing out of the front seat breaking the frame but he wouldn’t fix it. I’ve been sitting on an uneven cushion & backrest for years. It makes my back ache and my hips & spine feel crooked now but apparently a motorized seat for that car with installation is about $3,000 give or take and when you’re coming out of a recession, you just tuck a big, thick piece of fabric under your backside & keep rolling.

There’s always a Bright Spot – the silver lining – I left that guy that day and that’s when I found the Service Department at Nissan City of Port Chester, New York and am so very happy!!

Don, John & Thalita take very good care of Questy and me. Vasco and Brian make sure every detail is covered so she’s running smoothly.

Ozzie, the owner of Nissan City of Port Chester, is simply marvelous and helpful and we are so fortunate to have found this golden dealership & service department!

And that keeps this Nissan-driving Mama happy!

Who is Hofinger?

Our son loves his car! L-o-v-e-s! Yup, that’s him playing in the snow.

He worked hard for it and earned it completely on his own. It used to be black. Last year, this high performance baby came home white ~ satin pearl matte wrap. That all sounds lovely but what I think is really neat is his appreciation for the fine craftsmanship of this Mercedes-Benz AMG.

AMGs are hand built by one specialty engineer. It’s known as the “One Man – One Engine” philosophy. When our son saw his 

engine was signed by Thomas Hofinger, he had the signature made into a slate grey adhesive that proudly – yet subtly – adorned the corner of his black hood. He had the signature remade when he changed the car to white.

One day, a father who was at an event we attended started a conversation with my husband who was wearing a baseball cap with the Mercedes logo on it. They started talking about cars when the man told him he worked for Mercedes. My husband said our family has enjoyed the brand for decades and showed him a photo our son took of his car with the signature. “Oh, nice to see how much he loves his car, why don’t you give me your address, I’ll send him something.” We thought a cool Merc key chain or pen would be a nice surprise for our son especially after all his hard work. 

Time passed and life continued its routine. Then about a month later, a large cardboard envelope arrived in the mailbox. We all nearly fell over! A letter & photo of Thomas Hofinger saying he was “honored and stoked” to see his name on the hood of our son’s beautiful AMG!! It was just so cool!! And so unexpected!! It made the car come to life even more. “Let her roar and soar!”

In my story, “Encourage & They Will Excel” (click: Excel), I explain my husband’s & my belief in not “pushing” our children, but rather encouraging them with an array of opportunities & unconditional support. When our son, an Operations Director at a national company headquartered in NY, said he wanted to start a photography business, we were excited for him. He invested in a great camera, lenses, Flickr, and we supplied accessories, tripod, URL, etc. 

He has a passion for cars and wanted to center his photo art on that industry traveling weekends to car shows and enjoying time with his car buddies. Our son named his company Geared Photography – decidedly apropos. 

     
Fast forward a few years of hard work and his pics have been seen in lots of cool places including DriveTribe, the new website for The Grand Tour.

To see some more photos, click: Geared Photography. (Please note: A friend of our son’s is nicknamed Saucy – he’s a fellow photographer & car buff, too, and the 3 photos he took of our son are watermarked accordingly.)

 The Bright Spot – Watching your kids grow up doing what they love!

Our love for Mercedes runs deep ~ my father in his cherished Adenauer long ago. He’d be very proud of our son’s diligence. Miss you, Daddy.

The 1-Eyed Teddy Bear

The point of this story need not identify of the owner of the 1-eyed teddy bear, but rather WHO this fellow is made all the difference in saving our son’s cuddly animals.

The man actually cannot be identified because he is a secret agent on a very significant level. He is close to our family and we all adore him but we keep conversation limited to family stuff, old friends, or school happenings. He signs his holiday envelopes as James Bond. It’s all very cool in a surreptitious kind of way, the “secret” in secret agent makes it sound so hush-hush, and the undercover missions we are never allowed to know about are wrapped in clandestine mystery. All very exciting, so what does this have to do with stuffed animals? 

Our eldest is a strapping 24-year-old dude with beer posters in his room and a steady girlfriend at the helm.

Rewind about 14 years and here was a kid with a ton of stuffed animals, some from babyhood, others won at the amusement park, many from the big glass box with the grabber handle thingie at the diner. An admirer of big cats, one of his favorite was a huge white tiger with sharp blue eyes.

For a long time, my husband felt our son needed to unload his cuddly animals. I’d protest seeing the quiet sadness in our child’s eyes. The subject came up at significant milestones, like award ceremonies, moving from elementary to middle school, etc. I understood my husband’s point of view: he wanted to make our son grow up, be a man, get tough. I understood my son’s point of view: at that time he was still an only child and he wasn’t ready.

Then one year we visited Washington, D.C. and James Bond invited us to stay in his home. He was away, as usual, and he couldn’t say where he was, except that he would leave the key for us under the mat. Under the mat?!? He lives with all this enigmatic secrecy but leaves the house key under the mat!

It was very exciting to walk around his home. Medals, awards, Christmas cards from the presidents over the last 20 years, and as we walked upstairs to pick out our rooms for the night, there, in the middle of the master bedroom, sitting proudly atop the big bed, was a 1-eyed Steiff teddy bear with a worn nose, an untied yellow bow & fur so loved-off and cuddled, it was a treasure to behold.

It was also ammunition to ward off any more attempts to clear out stuffed animals from our son’s room. “If James Bond can keep his teddy bear, so can I!” 

So that was that. More than a decade’s passed and on his own, our son has donated his stuffed animals along the way – but that’s the important part of this story – it was on his terms, his timing and his choice of where they went. The huge white tiger is now the centerpiece & reading buddy in a fantastic enrichment school.
I never take anything from my children without asking them. Together we donate what they choose to give up when they choose to. It teaches them to let go, to give to others and to stay organized. (Little One sorting>>)

There is a marvelous organization called YoungLives which helps teenage mothers. Every 3rd Wednesday, the young mothers meet at a church in Norwalk, CT to learn about God and their children, plus, they can choose items they need that people have donated.

When our daughter was ready to donate her toys or princess dresses, etc., we would bring them to the church and she would see firsthand the children light up with joy as they picked out what they would like. She saw a little     2-year-old boy dive into her Elmo chair exclaiming, “That’s mine, I love this chair!” And little girls picking out sparkly dresses. Or Barbies. Or unicorns.

The children were happy and it made our child well up with joy to see the kids’ faces light up while new life was instantly breathed into her cherished pieces. It deeply linked giving to pleasure. You can check out organizations in your area like YoungLives, Birthright, Hopeline or any organization that benefits a cause you believe in. We’ve also donated her crib, baby furniture and Pack-n-Plays.

Our daughter has given up lots of her cuddly animals, even packing & sending many huge boxes to Africa.

The Bright SpotTM  – The exciting thing about the missionary we shipped her stuffed animals to is that they sent back photos of orphan children cuddling her animals! A fine day, indeed. Again, on our children’s terms while reinforcing a life skill of giving as a pleasure.

 

Whimsy & Reverie ~ Fairies Delight

 

 

Our darling last year at the renowned     New York Renaissance Faire (left).

 

 

 

 

 

 

For this year’s faire, she knew exactly what she was looking for in a gown…

 

For over 38 years, fairies & fellows, princesses & knights alike have gathered throughout 65 acres of Sterling Forest, Tuxedo, NY to celebrate the Elizabethan era at the Renaissance Faire!

 

 

 

We

 

 

 

 

 

We went again this year with family & friends. Our 10-year-old told us this is her favorite summer tradition, now several years running.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

From dragon rides…

…to cuddling baby dragons, there’s an adventure around every corner.

 

If you love acrobats & magic, sword fights & jousting, this is definitely the place for you.

With 20 stages and over 100 shops, there is something for everyone, young or seasoned.

 

 

Our Darling played the flute for the Woodland Fairy, the Acorn Fairy, the harpist and the Queen.

 

 

Armor and headdress for every age…

   
  

…thundering horses and overflowing … overflowing…well, simply overflowing…!!!…

 …overflowing attractions from wenches serving mead!

    

 

   

The Bright Spot – For swashbuckling pirates, jousting, boating on the lake or dancing around the Maypole, be sure to visit a Renaissance Faire near you, so magical, indeed!

I’m looking forward to seeing what our Darling picks out for her dress next year.

 

 

 

 

Sweet Acorn Fairy kisses farewell till then…

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