Pumpkin Henge
“Do you smell that, Mommy?” I wasn’t smelling anything, I was heading into
Party City for a dolphin balloon, last errand of the evening, my mind racing with the day’s events. “Smell what, Honey,” I asked, clutching her little, warm hand in mine as we weaved through the busy parking lot.
“Autumn.”
I stopped immediately between the safety of parked cars and looked at her. “What do you smell?” She looked up at me and then closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “The smokey smell in the crisp air, that smokiness you smell when fireplaces crackle and leaves fall gently outside and we get costumes for Halloween and then the holidays begin!” Then she opened her eyes and smiled serenely.
What a simple delight when we stop everything and listen to our children. When we halt our harried lives and smell the air around us. Yes, just stop and breathe. 
We took the kids to a 150-year-old farm for hayrides & pumpkin picking, corn mazes and strawberry fields…forever…
  
 
The girls worked hard creating their very own Pumpkin Henge: 
After 20 years, I’m turning in my Marilyn outfit to match our daughter as “princess & queen”
as we help coordinate this year’s Fall Festival and organize the costume parade with Batman.
Oh, I do love my Batman!  Click here for more about my very own Caped Crusader: http://theletstalkmom.com/tea-talk-momversations/my-caped-crusader/
The Bright SpotTM Â 
 – It’s not just roses we have to slow down for, smell the Autumn, too. 🙂 
Which One Are You?
Janet Jackson’s catchy tune “What have you done for me lately?” and John F. Kennedy’s famous quote from his inaugural address, “…ask not what your country can do for you — ask what can you do for your country,” can symbolize your view of a relationship. Where do you fall in your marriage?
For us, we try to do whatever we can to please one another. If I grab a bottle of water for the car or our room for the night, I grab one for Phillip, too. It’s not even a thought, it’s just automatic. And it goes for anything. If he makes a cup of tea, he always makes two. If I can make my husband’s life more comfortable with simple, loving gestures, I do. And vice versa.
Sometimes I’ll warm a towel or his robe in the dryer for him shortly before he steps out of the shower, or I’ll chill a wine glass in the fridge before he comes home from work. These aren’t hard things to do, they don’t take effort, and are so appreciated. My husband sometimes leaves little notes in the big soup pot that say, “I love you,†and I leave naughty notes in his briefcase.Â
I learned very early on in our marriage that Phillip was a giver and a pleaser, and it made me want to do things for him in return. And so it went back and forth, back and forth. Now that’s a relationship cycle one would want to keep going!
Years back when I was about 20, there was a significant holiday – I can’t remember which one at this point – but I bought 
two cards and gave one to my grandmother and one to my grandfather. My grandmother smiled at me tenderly as she gave her card back. She put her arm around me and said, “Your grandfather and I are one; we share everything. We love your thoughtfulness, but we only need one card.†Then she kissed me on the forehead and that was that.
Married 61 years, they were loving and kind to each other every day. They held hands when they walked, when they sat on the couch, whenever they could. The memories are beautifully indelible. Their diamond celebration story: http://theletstalkmom.com/romance-and-spice/the-diamond-celebration/
So as I went into my marriage, I thought to myself I could think, “What have you done for me lately?†…or I could be a thoughtful spouse and say to myself, “What can I do for my husband?â€
I know there are some people that might think I’m a wimp. Oh, contraire! When you are great to your significant other and your significant other is great to you, you are united, you are strong, you feel loved, and you are on the 61-year path.
The Bright Spotâ„¢ Â – When parents are strong together, the whole family benefits and thrives.
Â
Blue Moon Blast Off!
What better way to end Summer Fun 2012 than with a sky full of colorful fireworks on the beach in New York!  
A Blue Moon smiled down on us as my husband wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close. I leaned my head on his chest, the 
scent of him, his cologne and cotton candy was intoxicating. We watched the children with delight, eyes wide with wonder, as they enjoyed the last few nights of warmth & sea air this late summer weekend. Music rocked the crowd and folks started dancing on the boardwalk. It was like a movie.
The next day we took the kids to the Intrepid to visit the newly-opened Space Shuttle Pavilion. I didn’t realize seeing it for the 1st time up close would actually take my breath away~more than once at that!
   
  
Phillip gently touched the wing. “Don’t touch!” I chided, snapping into Mom mode and pointing to the Do Not Touch sign. “It was in outer space,” he defended, “it’s a marvel and I cannot leave without touching it. Besides, look at the side here – meteorites hit it & gouged the side panels. I can’t not touch it, it’s within reach, I’m not even leaning!” 
Later we toured the Intrepid aircraft carrier (see: http://theletstalkmom.com/tea-talk-momversations/immigrants-aliens-the-american-girl/Â for another story about the Intrepid!)
This visit we learned Intrepid is almost as long as the Chrysler Building (pic on right) 
& when it housed 3,000 people, the cooks used to bake 700 loaves of bread & grill 1,500 chickens per day! Per day! For years! Puts its size in perspective…
The Bright SpotTM  – Phillip’s spot on: Enterprise, NASA, the astronauts & our space history are all truly marvels! Bravo to American ingenuity!
The Eyes Have It
 God created them. My parents fashioned them. Dr. Kornstein perfected them!
After Lasik, the first thing I could see the next morning was the time on the cable box across our bedroom. Prior to that, all I could see was a neon green fuzz-blob hovering over a 56″ TV. I couldn’t even see the big cable box!
I headed to the bathroom and saw my eyes for the 1st time without contacts. Naked. Pure. Not covered by tiny plastic discs or lenses & frames. Just big, green, clear eyes. I was free. I was amazed. It was like looking at myself for the 1st time and really seeing myself. 20/15 vision for years now, all thanks to Dr. Howard S. Kornstein.
(radio in the 80s)
For 30 years I wore glasses. Big, small, dark, light, wire frames, colors, patterned, corner decals, you name it, I tried it.
By 8th grade, I tried contacts but from Day 1,            I always had a problem with them. Didn’t matter the brand, they were dry and irritating and with a career in television, I’d slip in my contacts for  on-air and rip them out between newcasts.
When I was on the TV show, The Morning Mix, Jeff Lamb often raved about his laser surgery.
 
 
Morning Mix memories:
Then, years later, I heard about bladeless surgery with Lasik and thought I can do this! Bladeless? I’m in!
So my husband & I met with Dr. Kornstein. Calm, gentle and very self-assured, he guided us through the initial consultation. He made me feel very comfortable so he and his team proceded to tell us about the procedure. “And then the flap…” The what! Flap started to come in & out of the conversation describing the cornea at certain stages. Wait a minute – I thought he was just going to beam some red light in my eye.
That’s when I started to feel queasy & woozy. “Please don’t use the F word again,” I warned as I started to feel myself wimping out. “I trust everything you’re going to do, please don’t tell me any more.” But they had to inform me about the procedure so I pointed to my husband, “He’s my other half, tell him,” and plugged my ears.
Sure, call me a baby, but that’s where I was at with my eyeballs and so be it! There were several visits to the doctor’s office for check ups before the surgery and each time we went I’d warn the staff & remind the doctor – no dreaded F word.
The day of the procedure I was very nervous and needed to talk to Dr. Kornstein but he was already in surgery. Pacing a while, I finally walked up to the receptionist and asked if anyone had ever walked out of the waiting room at this point. “No. You’d be the first.”
I headed to the elevator and pushed the button. My husband hugged me tightly and convinced me to get out of the elevator and go back into the waiting room. “I’ll see if I can get the doctor.” Dr. Kornstein came out to talk to me, “You’ve come this far, at any point you want me to stop before the procedure, I will.” You know, that’s all I needed to hear. I knew I was in good hands and started to relax.
There are several more check points before surgery and at each stage I told the staff, “Please don’t use the F word.” Everyone would chuckle and it lightened the mood.
When I was finally on the table, Dr. Kornstein gave me the option to leave. He was kind & confident and I said I would stay. A wonderful nurse stroked my arm through the whole procedure; she never stopped till it was over! I quietly hummed some odd tone the entire time, like a yoga ohm that wouldn’t stop. I spent so much time wondering if it bothered the doctor that it took my mind off what he was doing. I just couldn’t stop “ohming,” weird! And then before I knew it, it was done.
Dr. Kornstein was a miracle worker. I couldn’t go anywhere without my glasses or contacts for 30 years and for the last 8 years, I have this beautiful vision I never take for granted. And when our darling Grandma went blind, it hit home even more: Why I Love You & Is This The End
Our 7 year old had an emergency this week and he saw her straight away. He’s a Dad 1st and made our little one feel at ease in that oversized chair with the big googly-eyed equipment and stinging drops. All’s well, thank God, and thank you, Dr. Kornstein.
The Bright SpotTM Â – The EYESÂ have it!
Dr. Howard S. Kornstein, New York City or Westchester: 914 – 948 – 5157                                Look at the left-hand column of this site for a link to Dr. Kornstein
The Dulcimer~Giving the Gift of Music
Our daughter just turned 7. For years, she’s always had an amazing ability to hear a tune on the stereo or radio & walk over to her keyboard, working out the song while she hums softly to herself.
The other day my dulcimer sprung to mind. Tucked away for years, I thought what better gift than to pass along this cherished and beautiful rosewood & mahogany instrument ~ custom made for me to every delicate specification. Sure enough, within 15 minutes she figured out Twinkle Twinkle Little Star on her own.
Here is a quick 2-minute video of me playing the dulcimer years back…then the video transitions into just the other day when our daughter opened the case for the 1st time. We play Twinkle together that 1st hour with Dad proudly videotaping & at the end of this clip, she is playing the dulcimer for Grandma in England via Skype delighted with her special gift. Yes, very exciting for Mama, indeed. Thanks for sharing!  xo~b
Zumba Kicks It!
My sister loves Mexico. She lived in Puerto Vallarta for years while dating a Grammy award-winning rock star; she learned the language, loves the music & culture, learned to cook traditional cuisine and can tear up the dance floor.
She’s always been daring & adventuresome whether hopping in her open-topped Jeep Wrangler driving thousands of miles from New York > Puerto Vallarta, or hopping out of airplanes.
I visited her many times in Mexico, especially the years I lived in Texas, and we spent many a night shakin’ our thang to the beat of night music at the clubs along the famous malecon – the seaside promenade.
My sister’s always been more athletic than me. So it is no wonder that when Zumba came on the scene, there she was rippin it up every day, begging me to join her.
It’s taken months but I finally joined her today. I learned I’m not as young as I used to be (yes, to the right is the “then” in Mexico, the couch pic below is the “now” LOL!)
We have a tendency in our family to jump headfirst into everything with zeal and passion and exhuberance.
But somehow my freespirited soul didn’t tell my back that. Or my knee or my butt.
That’s right – Zumba kicked my butt!!
I came home aching & aaahhing and did what I love to do nowadays more than ever – hang out with my kids and put my feet UP!
The Bright SpotTM – I love my couch!
Wings
 
This month marks the anniversary of Daddy’s passing. It’s been many years now, but I can still picture that shocking moment like it was yesterday. Sudden, unexpected, heartbreaking.
I grieved deeply, crying a sea of sorrow…and I emerged strong, sturdy and resilient. Why?
Well, there are two main reasons. The first is because he was the most incredible father in the world to my sister and me and gave us unconditional love, time, tenderness and devotion.
The second reason dates back to when I was in college. His mother passed away and sometime later I was talking to him and asked him how he was not falling apart.
My father, one of seven children, said, “Although you haven’t seen my tears and pain, my parents raised me to be strong and independent; they gave me wings so one day I could start my own family and teach my children to be independent and give them wings. If I fell apart, my mother’s teachings would have failed, and there I will not fail her. That is completely different to my emotions which I feel deeply.â€
                                                  So sometimes, especially the years close to when my father passed away, those poignant feelings would pierce my heart, but I wouldn’t fall apart, because that would fail him.
 
He gave me wings and I am blessed to be a mother now having the honor to teach my own children to be strong, loving future adults with wings.
   
Daddy’s legacy is indelible. And this lesson is true: Be present with your children. Of course you love them, but give them 100% of your attention, be truly present. You know, push the swing without the handheld…rather than texting someone who’s not there, focus on the one who is there – the person who thinks you’re the world! The person you are giving wings to.
The Bright SpotTM – Daddy was kind & generous, and loved by his community. He was laid to rest on Valentine’s Day…appropriate for a man with such a big heart. To read all about my father’s story & see one of my *favorite pictorials*, click right here: http://theletstalkmom.com/tea-talk-momversations/daddy/
I miss you, Daddy, here’s to you!  
 xoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxo
But the Best Part was~~~
We recently got together with relatives to enjoy a refreshing stay in the 
majestic White Mountains of New Hampshire.
We shared a lovely home that slept 12, the views were spectacular and the kids enjoyed the indoor pool after long days hiking & caving…then they roasted marshmallows before bedtime.
We took in breathtaking sights at the Lost River with its powerful waterfalls, explored glacial gorges and admired the red-covered bridge from the 1800s along the Flume.
 
Dinners were scrumptious and the hospitality of the residents was delightfully warm & inviting. Aaahhh, it all sounds perfect…but do you know what the BEST PART was…
…when we went on a shopping spree that yielded the most unbelieveable savings: Phillip bought 2 pairs of leather shoes and a pair of cozy black suede boots valued at $200.00 for $3.97!!!!!
Yup! He handed the cashier a 5 dollar bill and smiled cheekily when she handed him change!
Turns out that there was a sale on top of a sale with an online coupon that he pulled up on his phone at the last minute and when all was said and done, the shoes were $3.97! Yahhhhooooeee!! Nothing feels better than a bargain!
 Hey, someone lose their glasses?!?! LOL!!
A Raw Lesson in Judging Others
We have all felt the sting of being judged. Simon even says at the beginning of this video, “Just when we thought it couldn’t get any worse.” Faces & sighs in the audience echo that sentiment.
Watch as this 17 year old brings an arena to tears!! Every time my husband & I watch this we have goosebumps & cry. We have always cheered the underdog & wanted to share this video with you.
Jonathan, you are amazing! Charlotte, you are a loyal friend. Simon, we love & appreciate when you give a standing ovation. Click here to enjoy:
Imagine
Imagine not knowing where or WHEN you were born. Imagine being left in a shoe box as a baby. Imagine being crippled and abandoned. This is a must-see, heart-wrenching, totally inspiring video that will put your life in perspective.
My husband sent it to me and told me to get the tissues ready. I sat in my studio and watched in awe. Before the end of the video I was on my feet clapping, crying, clapping some more – full of joy, delight, hope.
Give yourself a moment in your day & truly brighten it with this video. Bravo, Emmanuel!!!! Bravo to the mother who saved him and his brother!!!! Click here to enjoy:
Miles of Smiles
May I take this moment to thank all of you who made the Miles of Smiles campaign at Stamford Ford Lincoln a wonderful success.
Proud & dedicated dad, Dominic Franchella, owner of Stamford Ford Lincoln, reached out to the community to fill an F-150 Ford truck full of toys and coats for families in our area.
 
 
  
Phillip & I are grateful to all who participated in Miles of Smiles and we are thankful for Stamford Ford Lincoln’s Title Sponsorship of our radio show, “Let’s Talk!” a Life, Love and Parenting show on 1490am WGCH airing Live each week and later archived right here for your listening convenience (see nav bar above). The Bright Spot  – all of YOU who made this campaign a success to make little children happy in your own community. Thank you. ~b
Stamford Ford Lincoln 212 Magee Avenue in Stamford, Connecticut
