What You Give The World Gets

“The love you take is equal to the love you make,” oh, how I love this passage from The Beatles!

Like sponges, with unconditional love, your children will not only pass your love back to you a million-fold, but to their children and to the world. Ode to a good, ole fashioned snuggle!!

 

They are the mirrors of your life…set the examples of love, kindness, gentleness,

 

They are the Superheros to each other…

And with love…

and understanding…

they will blossom into giving and nurturing young folks.

 

Snuggle your children and it will come back to you and the world many times over.

 

 

The Bright Spot   – the natural and giving nature of children.

Such a joy! So grab your kids and snuggle away!! And watch the sun shine in your life with smiles!

The Making of a Superhero

Is he a kite-flyer?  Is he a trampoline-flipper?  Is he a bike-fixer?  Yes, he’s Superhero Big Brother!!

 

A hurricane protector, a shoe-tier, a cookie dough-maker, a tree climber, a boo-boo fixer, an Easter egg opener, a stuck zipper fixer, a skating racer, a perfect-pumpkin-picker, a snuggly dude, a super swing-pusher, the best storyteller, the technology teacher, the family-endorsed official opener of all packaged holiday toys, and, of course, an honorary member of the stroller posse! But most importantly, the kindest big brother who nurtures and protects his baby sister.

  

  

People often ask how we got such phenomenally-bonded children. As parents, when you show love, tenderness and respect to each other and to your children, it filters through the family, growing and bonding it together with immeasurable strength.

     

   

    

 

   

And from that strength, the freedom to love and express kindness and thoughtfulness is just natural.

    

Our son was 13 when our daughter was born. He was a part of the whole pregnancy journey, from building the crib and changing table with Dad, to using the zapper at Babies-R-Us to register for the baby. The baby shower was a huge party, not just for ladies, but for all friends, young and old, male and female, and our son was center stage as the new Superhero-in-the-making!

  

  

We put him in charge of opening the gifts which he unwrapped with great zeal seeing all the items he had zapped weeks earlier. He was an integral part of every step. And the day his baby sister was born, she gave him an I-pod, so, of course, she was just the coolest!

  

  

When he held her that 1^st day, he marveled, “She can’t even lift her own head.” I looked at him wearily and smiled, “No, she depends on us for everything, and she will look to you to teach her the most amazing things.

       

  

  
She will always look at you as her Superhero for the rest of her life. We are very proud of you.”

   

The Bright SpotTM   – Our daughter just turned 9 last week. Our son turned 22. He is a Superhero in our daughter’s eyes…and ours.

Pearl Princess

Ahh, to be 9! Our little one wished for a Pearl Princess slumber party and, sure enough, the 3-day birthday festivities kicked off with her friends celebrating her special weekend: the magic garden, hibachi dinner, Barbie mermaids for each child, The Pearl Princess movie, m&m smiley pancakes, a midnight dance party & 3am pillow fight. There were sparkle tattoos, buckets of slime, arts & crafts and a surprise party at the aquarium – a favorite place for our budding marine biologist. Can I be 9 again??                    

   

 

 

The Bright SpotTM – The whole birthday party weekend!! I went to sleep just before the 3am pillow fight and left Phillip on the couch asleep with one of our kitty cats. The girls each wrote their “observations” of him. So funny and so 9!!

Caribbean Pleasures

Nothing says Caribbean like the freeing feeling of music & dance in the evening breezes of the islands!                                        From high in the sky…

                

to underwater exploration, our 8-year-old reveled in every adventure at the gorgeous Barcelo, an all-inclusive resort in the beautiful Dominican Republic.
   

Tropical paradise & pristine waters,

Phillip’s favorite place…the swim-up bar, 

where our daughter bounced around in a giant beach ball

                                                                          plus, elegant dining on the beach,

and, of course, Brenda, the monkey, who wondered why our little one had a tail just like hers 🙂 !

We booked the getaway the night before & left 26 hours later.

The trip started with smoked salmon & the latest edition of Sparkle World magazine…

and went full swing into shopping when we realized we forgot hats & sunglasses.

     

Snorkeling in the Caribbean,

sunsets & full moons made for the perfect setting.

Barcelo’s food was as beautiful as it was delicious

and chess was a must.

If you are looking for a place to flip over on your next vacation, Barcelo is it!

From the glass-bottomed boats to pool lounges, there’s something for everyone.

  

So come here and make your sand turtles a reality,

paradise awaits.

The Bright SpotTM  – The Caribbean. Enough said. 😉

Stroke at 47!

An interesting turn of events 26 years ago would wind & wiggle and eventually lead me to my dream man. I lived in England with a woman who would not only become one of my very best friends in the world…like a sister, but who would introduce me to my husband. I am the Godmother of her sweet daughter (seen here in her arms which also happens to be her 1st birthday) and my sister is Godmother to one of her sons. I’m indebted to her forever for my amazing husband & darling children.

So when I received the phone call that she had had sudden hemorrhaging in her brain and was in the hospital’s acute stroke ward, we immediately booked a flight to England. As I stared out the window, I felt a rush of emotions & memories flood my mind.

I thought about the day we met under bizarre circumstances that led me to live in her house for 6 weeks; even though she had just gotten married.

It was supposed to be an overnight. Both she and her husband said I could stay as long as I’d like.

So I did.

     
I remember them taking me sightseeing around England (above: York) and I took them apple picking in Vermont (left), trips to the City, and tours through the colonial towns of Connecticut.

I remember blasting their stereo to my Madonna cassettes I toted to England in my plastic pink cassette case – it was the 80s, you know. They worked by day & I danced in long t-shirts around their house to Bon Jovi, Def Leppard and the Talking Heads.

I’d jog around their little village and chit chat with the neighbors, shop owners and the folks gardening along my way. By evening, I was all abuzz with the latest goings on.

Then back in the States, I remember the train ride to New York City to see a George Michael concert – gotta love those glasses!

And I was so happy my friend & her husband were there the night I earned the Miss Connecticut title heading to the Miss America competition & at the party for my parent’s 25th wedding anniversary.

I remember the excited but weary phone call from England the moment her 1st son was born…he’s now 22 and lived with us for 7 weeks this past year. I was thrilled when she requested I be there for the birth of her daughter. Long story for another day…

And after my dear friend suffered several miscarriages & was experiencing a very high-risk pregnancy, she still boarded a plane immediately to be by my side the day my beloved father died (click this link for pictorial: Daddy).

 

 

So there was no way I was not going to get on a plane as soon possible so I could hug a woman I admire and love so much.

………….Home with us relaxing                         My friend, Goddaughter, sister & me in England

The Bright SpotTM  – Cherish those you love. Give all of your heart to those who love you. Don’t waste time with people who aren’t sincere. There’s an expiration date on life, don’t miss any opportunities to hug those you love.

Doctors say they cannot operate on my dear friend because the bleeding is too close to the stem and one wrong move would end her life. Later today she undergoes another MRI. Prayers needed. With 3 children and a great husband, she’s taking life one day at a time. Doctors say the best thing she can do now is slow down. Perhaps a lesson for us all…to slow down…look around & give thanks for who you have in your life. I am grateful to have such wonderful friends. xo~b

Wet Pay

Soaked, but not forgotten, each foot was paid “Wet Pay” for standing in snow for hours.

The thought fondly came to me as I looked out the window now and saw snow on our roof, flurries blowing in the wind. I remembered the April Fool’s Blizzard of ’97 when a Nor’easter blasted through New England dumping nearly 3 feet of heavy snow.   Not many took it seriously because of the April 1st date, but if you lived through it, that storm became definitely one to remember!

Especially for me. I had been cast as an extra in Steven Spielberg’s upcoming film Amistad (DreamWorks SKG), a true story of mutiny and justice in 1839. Filming had just moved from nearby New Haven, Connecticut to Newport, Rhode Island and I was excited to be a part of an epic film starring Djimon Hounsou, Anthony Hopkins, Morgan Freeman & Matthew McConaughey. 

As I packed my car to leave, the snow just started to move in. My Dad said, “What on Earth would make you drive in this blizzard? I cannot understand this entertainment industry pull.” In the words of Ethel Merman, “There’s no people like show people,” honestly, there’s just no explaining us. My father knew I was a determined free spirit, just like him, and when I had a desire, nothing was going to stop me from doing it.

My parents never stopped us from pursuing anything. My travels around the globe on a ship, climbing the Great Wall of China or the pyramids of Egypt, soaking in the romantic history of the Taj Mahal, flying off to Europe a week after graduation for my 1st job, or saying “yes” to my beloved after 4 days in his presence. So really, how’s a blizzard going to stop me??

It didn’t. I hopped in my car and set off for Rhode Island. The 2.5 hour trip took nearly 7 hours.

  

A little slide off the interstate didn’t deter me; 3 cute officers pushed me back on the highway, later requesting an autographed Miss Connecticut photo each (it was on my licence plate).

    

I had 5 hours sleep and reported for wardrobe at 4:30am. Excited and ready to go, after hair & makeup, I found myself standing in snow for hours…with joy! Even the newspaper photo caption under my picture says, “Undaunted.” Yup.

 

  Changing the face of Newport (above)                    (above right)  The photo from the Miss America parade that got me the job with Amistad

Interestingly, the entire earlier part of the movie’s outdoor scenes that had been filmed in previous weeks did so with NO snow. So the outdoor snowy scene that took days to film had to be edited out. But the memories are incredible as are the people I met throughout the experience.

The Bright SpotTM  – Remember, if there’s something you really want to do, nothing can stop you. And just imagine the amazing people you’ll meet!

Reunited After 23 Years

Long before Facebook, Twitter, email, Smartphones & Androids, there was the regular land line.

I made a phone call to my Uncle in London that I was in Lancashire for the summer. “You must come and visit, we’ll pick you up.” He and my Auntie drove 4 hours north to get me. They had 5 girls and the summer was one I’ll never forget!

 

But, eventually, Autumn came and I headed back to the States and into my routine. Days turned into months and months into years. Before I knew it, 23 years had flown by.

In that time, my 5 cousins had married and everyone had moved, even their parents; some to other parts of London, others to California & Florida. 

I was reminiscing one evening about that summer and my son asked why I didn’t get in touch with them.

“How? We lost touch more than 20 years ago.” He asked me their names and worked his Facebook magic. I didn’t use Facebook at the time and was skeptical.

Within 24 hours, one of my cousins who had moved out West responded and we were on the phone for ages!

 

A short while later, our family was reunited in London with 2 of the sisters who had stayed in England. I was just bursting with joy! An event to remember forever!

The Bright SpotTM   –   I am so thankful to my Uncle & Auntie for making that visit one of the most treasured summers of my life. Interestingly, that summer would cause a chain of events that would lead me to my husband more than a decade later. Amazing how our lives are so intertwined then, now and always.

The girls now with their parents & one of my favorites of them when they were little. I love you all, my dear family!! xoxo

(Below) With my Uncle 23 years ago and Uncle’s portrait over my Cousin’s & my shoulder

Positively Me!

The Positively Me program offered to 3rd grade girls to boost confidence, teach assertiveness & expression, and offer strategies to prevent bullying was positively fantastic!

Offered free by the Junior League of Greenwich, this intensive 2-day event encourages new friendships while the girls develop strength and resilience through skits & role playing, dance, journaling & thoughtful conversations about the painful consequences of bullying.

Why 3rd grade?

Unfortunately, bullying is starting earlier & earlier; it’s a topic Phillip & I have covered often over the past 15 Seasons on our parenting radio show “Let’s Talk!” currently on WGCH, formerly on WSTC & WNLK. (All shows are                           (All shows are archived on this site.)

One of our popular recurrent guests and parenting experts, Dr. Michelle Anthony, experienced something similar with her little 2nd grade daughter. That painful situation prompted her to co-author Little Girls Can Be Mean – 4 Steps to Bully-Proof Girls in the Early Grades.

Positively Me: only 4 sessions per year, 36 girls per session. The program has run for 5 years and waiting lists get longer year after year. It was marvelous to see the girls beaming each evening at pick-up, full of laughter and stories and joy.

They brought home beautiful button bracelets that matched button cards where each color represented something special, drawings/writings/self-portraits in their special journals, t-shirts with signatures of each participant, water bottles, sparkly feather pens, tote bags with the adorable Positively Me logo and mountains of coping skills to nip future snafus in the bud! 

The program taught them to take pride in themselves and their accomplishments; achieve great things; stand up for what they believe in and to be Positively Me!

The girls had a special visit from a martial arts Sensei (master) who had them write their greatest fear on a wooden board and then he taught each girl how to smash through that wood with their bare hands…breaking through their fear. That was a popular activity! Other events included a yoga class, pajama party and crafting dog toys to donate to Adopt-A-Dog.

It is no wonder this program continues to grow and expand.

The Bright SpotTM  – A poem – with permission from our 8-year-old - to share with you written in her Positively Me journal:

STAND STRONG:

LOVE is my Guardian

When Days like Today Get in my Way,

I’ll STAND STRONG!

Journaling during this 2-day event:
Positively Me Snippet 

2 & 15 – 8 & 21

Superhero Big Brother & Adoring Little Sister ages 2 & 15        &      ages 8 & 21…

No one has to tell you time flies. But sometimes we need reminders that making every moment count does not mean filling those moments with endless, scheduled activities.

Sometimes the best memories are the quiet ones, just chilling on the trampoline with your brother or sister, stuffed animal or dearest friends.

Listening to the birds chirp, watching an airplane fly by, smelling freshly-cut grass, discovering shapes in white, puffy clouds.

The Bright SpotTM  - Life is fast enough. Slow down & enjoy the simple pleasures all around you.

Reverent & Peaceful

Our 8-year-old was asked to be Mary at Christmas Eve candle light services.

It was such an honor.

An orchestra played and a harpist filled the air with melodic sounds of yesteryear.

   

    
……………. She was so reverent and checked on her baby often during the hour.

   

The children sang like angels and the bell ringers sounded heavenly.

The Bright SpotTM – Everything. Our daughter made us proud. Our family felt blessed. And the Sanctuary was filled with love, light & joy. Merry Christmas!

And to all who celebrate different creeds, let’s enjoy one another’s traditions and learn about the beauty of each other’s beliefs.

Granddad with his Beloved Once More

It was a long 2 years without Grandma but she came calling for Granddad in his dreams this week.

 

 

 

 

 

He      He became deaf, and she turned blind just a few years ago, but they always sat beside one another for 60 years, and when she was gone, he lived in silence beside an empty chair in the den. Click here: Is This The End?

Granddad fell in love with Grandma instantly. She was engaged, but that didn’t deter him. He knew she was his only one and promised to love her till the end of her life. They married and he fulfilled that promise day after day.

He was determined like that. He fibbed about his age to defend his country in World War II saying he was 18 when he was really 16.

He was stationed in France, and worked as a specialist sending morse code messages when his communication’s truck was hit by a mortar and his arm was blown off.

                      A female physician – rare to have a female doctor in the war zone in France at that time – sewed it back on…it functioned perfectly!

     

   

  

Granddad was sharp as a tack with very dry humor. Once, he was in the hospital for a respiratory illness that required a chest x-ray. The doctor came into his room looking shocked. “I don’t know how to tell you this,” he said, “but you only have 1 lung and it appears where your other lung should be is a black mark that could be a tumor.” “Oh, that other lung shriveled up years ago,” Granddad answered matter-of-factly, “forgot to tell you.”

Grandma & Granddad gave our little one Tidmouth Sheds for her train table. I put a photograph of them next to it so she could link that the gift was from them. I do that with many special presents so the kids know from whom it came.

Our daughter said she will never give up her piano from Granddad even if she plans for a grand piano in her future. “It will go somewhere special in my house and I will keep it forever!”

Just as Granddads do, he was the explainer of all things.

 

 

No place was better than on Granddad’s knee…

 

 

                                      …& on his back!

Or hanging out grabbing a drink at the pub.

 

Granddad slowly went deaf in his late years. Soon he could only hear female voices. Later, on the phone, he could only hear mine – high-pitched & loud, I’m told. But then came the day when even my voice was inaudible.

 

 

It was crushing for me because I like family to stay connected especially because we are so far away.

Granddad was 88 years old. He wasn’t on a computer. I immediately printed out this website and Phillip had it bound and we sent these 300 pages of family stories and photos to Granddad in book form so he could read them over time at his leisure and keep up with family news he could no longer hear. 

He was kind and sweet and dear and loving. He will be deeply missed by the family. But he’s in his beloved’s arms once again and that gives us great solace. 

The Bright Spot TM –  We did not lose Granddad, for someone is only lost if their memories aren’t kept alive. We’re a picture-snapping, video-taking, storytelling family, so Granddad lives on. Thank you for sharing his story.

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