A Foundation for Happy Siblings
People often ask me how at 13 years apart our children are so close, so bonded, so happy as siblings, so thoughtful with one another.
From the moment we told our 8th grade son I was pregnant, we made his comfort level & happiness our #1 priority.
I told him he would be her Superhero Big Brother! I also pointed out that the 
benefit of the huge age gap was that there would be no sibling rivalry ever – she would never want his big teen guy stuff & he would never want her tea sets and Barbies. It was just easy from the very beginning.
I also put him in charge of the baby shower gift registry. Phillip showed him how to use the zapper in the baby section at Toys R Us. He took great pride in our confidence of his decision-making as he compared & contrasted each item. We also let him zap a few goodies for himself so he felt extra special, too!
The baby shower was a big party not just for ladies – we had family, friends…girls, guys, kids. We three opened the packages later that evening. Phillip read the cards, I wrote the list of names & we had our son open the packages. It was exciting because every present was so beautiful and HE chose each item himself. When he found a bonus package here and there for
himself, it was like a birthday or holiday. We made that shower so fun for him.
The following day, he & Dad built the crib, changing table, bassinet, play sets & anything else that needed assembling. Our son felt accomplished & connected!
On the day of her birth, he waited with my Doula, opening a surprise gift from his soon-arriving baby sister. He spent the time reading the instructions for his new IPod & testing all the cool features! What a sister!
When he first held the baby, he noted how tiny & delicate she was. He was in awe.
The Bright Spot – Our son has lived up to his incredibly important role as Superhero Big Brother! He was there for each milestone & helped teach her how to walk, go down a slide, tie her shoes & zip her coat. He saw her 1st missing tooth, took her on her 1st sleigh ride and taught her how to ride her bike. For every 1st, her Superhero Big Brother was there!
For a monumental event in our family’s life, click this link: BHUp
Click here for The Making of a Superhero: Superhero Big Brother
Our Soldier Surprises His Sister at School!
Our son is a Soldier in the Elite 82nd Airborne Combat Aviation Brigade.
Our B-e-s-t CHRISTMAS ever as he comes home unexpectedly & surprises his sister at school after being away for a year!
Starts off with a few kids, then hundreds gather to form a huge semicircle to witness the surprise! The Principal says he saw a horseshoe form with nearly 600 kids!
Thank you to all of the students who came up afterwards & thanked our son for his service!
Credit: Buddy Brown, Lyrics: Daniel Brown, Album: Deep South ~ Stop When You See a Uniform
Click this video below:
The Bright Spot – Celebrating the holidays together!!Ziplining at Niagara!
Ready for some excitement, I got up one morning & proclaimed, “Pack some clothes, we’re driving to Canada!â€
Truly, one of the most marvelous spur-of-the-moment trips ever ~ complete with sunny skies & 80 degrees!! We spent a supremely-packed 46 hours at Niagara Falls!
Night arrival in Ontario, Canada to the powerful glacial phenomena at Horseshoe Falls & the American Falls in all their glory in ever-changing brilliant colors!
We grabbed ponchos and headed to the water’s edge straightaway!
We enjoyed a gorgeous suite with center views of Horseshoe Falls at the Embassy Suites – pure magnificence outside our 10th floor window!!
And look at the morning mist below & the stunningly beautiful vista at breakfast!
That’s our hotel & the incline trolley to the Falls! And can you see the small red boat on the left-hand side?? That’s the Hornblower with a passenger capacity of 700! Yeah, that’s how huge these Falls are – hard to capture in a pic! The Hornblower has been in operation for 170 years and, in 2016, carried 2.2 Million people that year!!
We spent the day at Marineland where our daughter enjoyed the 450’ tower drop – height of a 45-story skyscraper – and rode it 3 times with great joy. Then she went on Dragon Mountain, the world’s largest steel roller coaster covering more than 30 acres. Plenty more rides followed by a visit to the beluga aquariums – one for the males, one with 34 young belugas and one maternity pool for 
pregnant belugas! Our marine-loving 14-year-old fed and caressed a beautiful female whale with continued appreciation for these amazing animals (click: Sea Trek or Dolphin Trainer or Harmony & Magic)
This was followed by a most striking sight – the rainbow over Horseshoe Falls!! A rainbow appears every day as the sun sets and hits the mist. 
We then watched the Niagara Fury movie protected by ponchos in this full-immersion film – covering us with snow, water, wind and a moving floor! We topped off that first day with an unnerving walk through the deep tunnels of Niagara, actually journeying
BEHIND the thundering falls!!!! 
Tunnels built in the 1800s, the massive force of the clear waters roaring overhead and all around made me glad when I was back above ground! 
The following day, we traversed the Maze of Mirrors & then enjoyed lunch at the famed Rainforest Café where our daughter said she enjoyed the world’s largest steel roller coaster & mega tower drop but she needed something “more thrilling.†
We asked her what she had in mind. Ziplining at the Falls! Oh, of course. So after lunch, our daughter found herself 220 feet above the Niagara River Gorge alongside her father because I sure as heck wasn’t doing it!!
They traveled 2,200 feet at speeds of 70+kph along the breathtaking vista of the American Falls to the outer rim of Horseshoe Falls!! An experience of a lifetime was how they both described it! A bucket-list moment – volume up! to enjoy this quick video:
I loved the beauty, visitors, rainbows, wineries ~ Niagara Falls, Ontario is a must-see!
Love locks on Lock Bridge, Canada – photo taken by my love, Phillip.
We topped off the late afternoon with Dairy Queen and said goodbye to Ontario, Canada as we headed 3 hours south to the Benn Conger Inn, a gorgeous Colonial built in 1921 for State Senator Conger in Tompkins County, New York & the Skaneateles Lake region.
Click here now for those beautiful photos & experience: Skaneateles
The Bright Spot – Bucket list moments. Enough said.
Dress Blues
“A much-anticipated & well-earned graduation celebration…on this momentous day, these Soldiers join the ranks of the world’s finest Army. The Soldiers have been infused with the Army’s 7 core values: loyalty, duty, respect, selfless service, honor, integrity and personal courage.†(Fort Jackson graduation booklet)
Less than 1% of the US population serves. The United States has over 1.4 million troops including 865,000 in reserve.
Fort Jackson is the US Army’s main Basic Combat Training hub producing over 60,000 trained, disciplined & physically fit warriors per year!
The Fort is a phenomenon unto itself: 81 square miles – that is 4 times the size of Manhattan!! Yeah, digest that for a moment. 52,000 acres with over 1,000 buildings & 10,000 folks at any given time.
We had no contact with our son aside from (2) 27-second phone calls November till Christmas, then after the holiday break, click:(Boots in the House), there was zero contact allowed except letters so our family activity from January 3 – February 5 was to send him 24 letters.
Remarkably, the hardest part of those months was The Forge – which actually started on his birthday! THE FORGE: 96 grueling hours with less than 10 hours of sleep on little to no food * 54-mile walk with 80 pounds of gear within the 52,000-acre fort * live fire overhead day & night with simulated combat testing all limits of human endurance.
“Since 1917, Fort Jackson has carried out its sacred responsibility of “Forging America’s Army†by transforming civilians into Soldiers. These Soldiers are the lifeblood of the readiness of the United States Army.†“Basic Combat Training transforms volunteer civilians into Soldiers…ready for close combat…through realistic training…including marksmanship, hand grenade employment, and chemical, biological and nuclear survival [including radiological]…with field training and testing through The Hammer, The Anvil & The Forge.â€
10% don’t pass. They must undergo training again…and clean the stadium after graduation!
Our son was one of the last 48 
Spartans. After graduation, the Soldiers packed & left at midnight for their advanced training locations. Our son was transported to Virginia where he will train as a Black Hawk engineer and is commissioned to serve 8 years (6 active/2 reserve). He was voted by his peers at combat training most likely to stay in the military making it a 20+ year career. Sounds about right!
Joint Base Langley–Eustis is the only Black Hawk training facility in the world! There are Soldiers from many different countries studying at this U.S. Army Aviation Logistics School.
1/3 of the advanced training Soldiers are booked for the Night Owl shift – school classes from 1am to 7am!! That’s what he was assigned.
Uh, let that sink in for a moment. Wakes at 9pm for breakfast, physical training & studying till midnight, classes 1am to 7am!!
Every class is intense & chock-full of information. If any Soldier misses a single class during Advanced Training, they are sent back to the 1st day. No exceptions. It’s like Chutes & Ladders on speed with every chute back to 1st place!!
Our son will be part of the 18th Airborne Combat Aviation Division, part of the 1st-to-Deploy Emergency Responders Unit! Oh, boy.
But the good news is that his barracks are brand new – he doesn’t have to room with 60 guys now, just 3 to a room and we can Facetime him!!! 
Dear son, we are soo proud of you!! Congratulations & well done getting through the rigors of combat training & good luck on your studies! (See latest UPDATE below the video!)
What makes me so happy is that our son is very happy with his decision. Thank you for choosing to protect our country!!
Here are highlights by Videorama Productions from this beautiful graduation: Click this video to enjoy:
Also, be sure to see the new UPDATE below following this video!
Update June 2019
Proud our son was selected as Master Sergeant of Leadership for a platoon at his base in Virginia. And with his outstanding 
performance during advanced training, he has now been commissioned to our nation’s premiere US Army’s Elite 82nd Airborne Division, regarded as the best-trained infantry on the globe. (Photo Credit: US Army / 82nd Airborne Division / Staff Sgt. Kissta DiGregorio)
Unfortunately, that also makes them the Department of Defense’s #1 responders to crisis contingencies worldwide within 18 hours. Scary, but we pray for peace for all! (Photo Credit: US Army)
Our 82nd Airborne Black Hawk Engineer has also been recommended for Flight Instructor.
Meanwhile, when he does have downtime, he’s relaxing with this adorable little kitty who belongs to his battle buddy & wife who live on base.
In July, he’ll move to North Carolina to the largest military base by population in the world with over 50,000 active duty personnel on more than 163,000 acres covering 4 counties. (Manhattan is 14,000 acres)
The Bright Spot – We are thrilled with all of your 
accomplishments, dear Son, and look forward to your wonderful future ahead!!
The AA on the 82nd Airborne patch means “All American!” He just received it with his wings yesterday!! So proud!!
Boots in the House!!
Like Boots on the Ground, Boots in the House is what it’s called when your soldier is home!!! Songs like “I’ll be Home for Christmas†were so much more than a pretty tune. After our son’s decision to leave the 
comforts of home, great job and lovely girlfriend to defend our nation and commit to 6 years active duty (click: BHUp), we were so happy to hear the only time in the year recruits come home during their 10 weeks of basic combat training is for the December holiday season. We were so thankful especially since there was no communication aside from two 27-second calls saying he was there and fine.
Friends & strangers writing to me as a new Army Mom offering support often said he’ll leave a boy & return a man. It’s only been 4 of the 10 weeks and they were right. His stance, carriage, conversation, so confident, so strong. Army Strong! Mind-bogglingly, the Army has already spent $77,000 per recruit the 1st 4 weeks on weapons, 80 pounds of equipment, supplies, etc.
The 52,000-acre Army Basic Combat Training hub at Fort Jackson, South Carolina with over 100 ranges & 1,160 buildings produces over 60,000 trained, disciplined & physically fit warriors per year!
Our son left Fort Jackson with 6,824 other soldiers snapping this photo before heading out. He said it was like a sea of green flooding the hallways of the airport.
All the soldiers were given a message in a Coca Cola bottle & a young boy ran into the airport store and bought our son an ornament to thank him for his service. He said the public outpouring of American support was overwhelming and heartwarming.
He surprised his little sister (click: Superhero) by walking into a coffee shop while she waited for me. I wanted so much to catch the moment but I stayed away or his wish could have been ruined. A neighbor’s grandfather saw it all for us. As this granddad, our son & daughter describe, he walked in the bustling shop and she looked at him for a long moment trying to comprehend what was happening. He looked like her brother, but he was not due. It took a few seconds to realize this buff, clean-shaven fellow with dark-rimmed glasses (Army-issued ballistic lenses!), standing tall before her was her Superhero Big Brother. She burst upright shrieking with delight as she leapt into his arms & they hugged for ages.
He arrived on my husband’s birthday, what a celebration! In a nutshell, here are some things we learned about. He didn’t sleep the 1st 50 hours & didn’t have time to think of the sleep deprivation as they had the recruits moving constantly through the initiation phase including a 2-sided line of every vaccine imaginable for soldier warfare 
warfare readiness including anthrax, typhoid, yellow fever, small pox, etc.
The soldiers are up every day at 4am for 17 hour days except Sundays. The have 5 minutes to be ready. They have 5 minutes for meals. They learn to shovel down food no matter how hot & run back to training immediately.
Disciplinary Action – if one person does something wrong, that person does not get punished. Everyone else is punished and the person has to stand and watch. Yup, that’s one quick way to get everyone on the same page!! And yes, drill sergeants do yell at the top of their lungs as the rim of their hat hits your forehead.
2 challenging tasks included rappelling down the 50-foot wall & taking off their masks in a gas chamber.
Everyone has been so supportive of our son’s decision. There’s only been one person who balked when she found out. The problem is that he was standing right next to me and was going to leave shortly. He had no idea what he was in store for and she’d known him 10 years. Her reaction gutted me. If she were that anti, she could have told me privately. It was so sad because he was right there. I asked him how he felt when we were in the car. “Don’t worry, Mom. I stand by my commitment to defend this country and its freedoms, and I’d die for her, too. That’s what freedom means.â€
Interestingly, visiting a friend’s home with him during this holiday break who is so anti-gun she helps run the campaign on a local level, she greeted him with a hug saying she understands the great sacrifice he’s making for our nation’s defense and introduced him to her grandson saying, “This is a real soldier.†She melted my heart.
The Army has felt the latest generation of new recruits has often been undisciplined, disrespectful and overweight. A tougher regime of physical training beyond human limits meant to prepare for any combat situation has been implemented to ensure our American soldiers remain the strongest in the world.
- By Joseph Cranney jcranney@postandcourier.com April 8, 2018
- To cap the 10 weeks of basic training… Army trainees must pass …a final test — a simulation of a nighttime invasions staged in the woods of the 52,000-acre base.
- Over 4 days, the course tests recruits on virtually every aspect of their training — including patrols, obstacle courses, hand-to-hand combat and more than 45 miles of marching.
- The course is part of the Army’s response to a call from leadership for tougher, more physically fit soldiers …
- It’s also intended to address the Army’s concern that an emerging generation of trainees grew up with less exercise and are less attuned to discipline.
- The Army calls its new training course The Forge, akin to the final stage of hardening a metal. Like the similarly challenging Crucible for Marines, completing The Forge is now a prerequisite to becoming a soldier.
- Trainees leave their barracks at midnight and return after 96 hours of missions with light rest. They sleep on the ground in the woods…
- Army leaders said it stands to become one of the military’s most grueling tests.
Our son heads back for the final 6 weeks of combat training & The Forge before graduating & taking the walk above as graduate, team member, soldier. Then he’ll head to Virginia for training as a specialized Black Hawk Engineer.
The Bright Spot – He loves his decision & has no regrets.
I miss our son so much! It’s hard for a parent. Even the tree at our CVS looked camouflaged!
God bless you, dear son, as you head into your new future.
And God bless our troops here & abroad.
Black Hawk Up!
Today marks a monumental change for our family that affects all of us especially our daughter.
Her Superhero left home today.
For a long time.
Click this link for: Superhero
We are a particularly close family. This is big for us.
(Our son telling his sister the news) 
(Looking over the enlistment papers & his future career path)
An officer picked him up from the house; he will fly to South Carolina for the U.S. Army Aviation division.
He made the decision 3 weeks ago to defend & protect our nation & honor all those who have gone before him. 
It all happened quite quickly. He will become a Black Hawk engineer. The UH-60L Black Hawk starts at $5.9 million.
We thought it would just be for 2 or 3 years. He has been commissioned for 6 years!!! 
(Credit/3 photos: AlphaCoders.com Lockheed Martin/Sikorsky Military UH-60 Black Hawk)
We celebrated Thanksgiving with him last Wednesday; he will be home for a few days for Christmas. We will have no contact with him except for 2-3 minute phone calls on a Sunday, only if earned.
On our last full day yesterday, 9 of us including his girlfriend and some friends enjoyed a memorable lunch & show at Medieval Times. 
Our family had breakfast this morning together and our children hugged their good byes. Our little one left for school with a brave face although her heart was breaking.
I’m glad for the hustle & bustle of the holidays so we can’t focus on the emptiness in our hearts during the coming weeks.
We thank everyone for the countless emails, texts, etc., pouring in. Here are a few:
From our daughter’s principal: “How proud of your son you all must be and I must say that I am too! I am sure this is difficult on all of you, in spite of the pride, but clearly your daughter will miss him tremendously. We will be sure to be of any support we can. Next time you speak with him please send him my best.â€
Jane Fendelman, author, therapist & recurrent guest on “Let’s Talk!†wrote, “It takes a very generous heart for a mom to be happy for her son stepping out in a whole new way. His life is going to expand times 100.â€
One of our daughter’s 6th grade teachers wrote, “Tell your son thank you for his service – it takes a strong person to join the army. What an amazing role model he must be for his little sister.â€
One of her 8th grade teachers wrote, “My family is a big fan of Black Hawks! I have the utmost respect for her brother. What a selfless and generous decision.â€
Our daughter’s 2nd grade teacher wrote, “WOW! Proud mama moment! I’m sure you have a range of emotions with this one. Hang in there and know that his service is much appreciated.â€
Oh, yes, the emotional pendulum is swinging, that’s for sure. Proud, happy, sad, nervous, excited, thrilled. He just left a few hours ago and we miss him so much already!
I suppose a uniform was always in our son’s future. From the time he wore the cap of one of New York City’s Finest to the moment the Associated Press
captured this photo at the 9-1-1 Memorial at Yankee Stadium, he proudly wore his uniforms as a Cub Scout, Boy Scout, Volunteer Firefighter & Cadet at Valley Forge Military Academy & College.
The Academy was founded in 1928 by Lieutenant General Milton G. Baker. The 1st cadet to enroll was Guy Wheeler, Jr., who graduated in 1934. He was awarded the Outstanding Alumnus Award given for outstanding service to the school. (Fellow cadet & our son long ago)
General Baker awarded this flag to Cadet Wheeler, Jr., for his services to the school. The flag hung in his office until his retirement. Following his death, he was buried next to the chapel at Valley Forge and the flag was given to his son, Guy Wheeler, III, an alumnus of Valley Forge, Class of 1968.
Mr. Wheeler presented this flag to our son on July 15, 2008 for his inspiring passion and love of VFMA&C.
I’d like to say I’m prepared for what lies ahead, but, in truth, I am not.
It’s all happening so fast. I received an informational email with the Subject line: “Welcome to the Army Family – Pre-Ship Parent Information†followed
by “I welcome you because as the parent of a soldier, you, too, are serving in the United States Army.â€
Daunting. But the email is full of links, videos, seminars (one is tomorrow night – my husband & I will log into it to learn about the 1-2-3’s of the Reception Battalion and Basic Training before our son’s specialized training begins in his chosen field.
The Bright Spot – Proud of our son. Proud of our country. Proud of all who serve. God bless America!
Well, here we go! Maybe you’ll leap right into something you’ve always wanted to do & see what new adventures lie ahead. Until we leap into his arms again, we will miss him with all our hearts. We love you, dear son!
See how our Darling’s brother became a Superhero, click here: Big Brother 
20th Anniversary
Happy 20th Anniversary!
These photos are of our weddings in England & America.
They were 4 weeks apart both under a full moon.
In the last group of photos, there’s a picture of us today.
For more on the English wedding, click here: Castles & Vows
Since my beloved father had passed away suddenly the previous year, my husband’s wonderful father walked me down the aisle in England and my father’s best friend, Prince Abdul Ali Seraj, walked me down the aisle in America. My sweet dog, Moussie, with his huge white bow led the way down the aisle!! And I love how Moussie’s standing next to me in the above picture!
For the story on this amazing dog, click here: Moussie
I had wonderful bridesmaids at the English wedding & the American wedding and, of course, the best maid-of-honor, my sister! Most bridesmaids flew back and forth. Look closely and you’ll see my sweet furbaby, Moussie, sitting on the grass with his big white bow in front of the blue dress!!!
Then & now….photo from today. *Poof* ~ 20 years flew by!
I had my bouquet designed after my mother’s bouquet. I’ve gazed upon my mother’s wedding portrait since I was a baby. It was something to love and cherish and admire. She had natural stems and a huge red bow, biggest I’d ever seen. She cradled the bouquet in one arm. I brought a copy of her portrait to the florists in England & the States for both weddings.
The Bright Spot – Love. I love how my mother looks at my father devotedly. She adored him. He was her one and only and she’s lived these 21 years alone since he died but she keeps his memory alive always talking about him when we’re together. It’s sad and beautiful at the same time.
My husband and I have been through a lot these 20 years. Of course, I appreciate all the blessings of our wonderful family, especially my children, and the life Phillip and I have created together.
But there have been many tragedies – 5 miscarriages, Phillip’s aggressive Stage 4 cancer (click: The Good, The Bad & The Spicy), loss of our company in the deep recession, other complete miseries throughout the years, and now the weird lightning bolt that took out our well pump the day before our 20th Anniversary costing us $3,700 wiping out our summer vacation fund for the vital rest Phillip needed since he missed vacation last year because of more cancer treatments.
So you can imagine how thoroughly touched I was when a friend through Facebook whom I’ve never met but mutually feel kinship toward for an assortment of reasons including the fact that she loves animals and is just simply amazingly kind, wrote this:
Wow! Truly, Liz captured the essence of these two decades. Thank you, Liz, for your kindness toward us, animals and all whom you serve.
Everyone Needs Their Mum!!
We had a 2-week window between Phillip’s last chemical injection and the start of his radiation. It will be 40 rounds of daily radiation from June through August. He wanted to see his Mum. Click: Amazing Grace. Everyone needs their Mum at a time like this!
So we took our little one out of school late May/early June for this family emergency and visited relatives in Europe. Aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews, Godchildren, close friends, everyone we could see within 2 weeks.
Phillip’s mother was overjoyed! Her 89th birthday was in June and she said seeing her son was the best gift ever!
Naturally, everyone we saw wanted to know how treatments were going. We could not rehash the details over and over. Not only is it draining for us but we didn’t want these conversations to overwhelm or frighten our youngest. Most of the time, we can shield her from it but when you’re traveling from home to home – or pub to pub, as is the case in England – folks want to catch up and we’re very sensitive to little ears in range.
Plus, we have striven to reclaim normalcy in the household & beyond for our family. Playing with friends & doing cool things was a mainstay.
 
 
  
And Legoland was awesome but laying on the grass topped all!! Why? Because there are no ticks or pesticides for ticks at all where Grandma lives and Darling was so happy!! It’s the little things, isn’t it?
 While staying for an overnight with dear friends about a hundred miles south of Scotland, we ventured with the girls to a nearby castle where parts of Harry Potter & Downton Abbey were filmed, click: Castles & Angels
Later, we drove nearly 300 miles south to Oxford to visit the university and delve into the history of this beautiful medieval city, click:Â OxfordÂ
And because our budding marine biologist, during these 2 weeks, would unfortunately be missing a highly-anticipated field trip to the beach to explore the biodiversity of the water’s ecosystem, we wanted to do something special for her and booked her for Seatrek at what’s known as Europe’s 1st 
Seabed Walk:Â SeaTrek
Her 5th grade teacher kindly allowed our daughter to give a full presentation to her class on the 3 adventures above & what made each so special.
And speaking of 5th grade, the Friday we left for the airport was the same day her class was split into just girls/just boys earlier that morning for “The Talk.†You know the one. Menstruation, growing bodies…
But unlike the lecture we had in school when I was that age – along with a cartoon movie with dancing flowers depicting our blossoming into young ladies – this talk was not only about girl stuff…but boy stuff, too! Would be shocking, but the school explained that with the advent of the Internet, kids see much more than we did at this age and need to know more material to educate and protect themselves.
Humm… Still found it shocking. But it certainly made for fits of laughter – of which we need much of these days – and especially with a silly 5th grader! as we passed 
by unassuming pubs like the Dandy Cock, or were served Nobby Nuts (salted peanuts) or when we read Spotted Dick on the menu – a British sponge pudding made with raisins & served with custard – but I mean, seriously, come on!
 
When we all revived in the car from laughing so hard, we arrived at one of Phillip’s oldest friend’s for a lovely meal. No, not at the Dandy Cock. We walked over buttercup-covered hills and along lakes & clifftops.
 
The Bright Spot – finding the hilarious things in life out of the simplest moments! And appreciating the glorious countryside with our loved ones.
My Caped Crusader
Whether my dear husband is busy
at Gotham City’s Sherry-Netherland’s Doubles on 5th Ave sweeping ladies off their feet…
or me off mine… 
… giving speeches 
or playing Cricket…
chillin’ or racing 
giving sweet baby kisses
and super Daddy hugs…
…corporate by weekday and
Hearth Warrior by weekend
(God, I love those legs!)
…and whether he’s playing peacefully or keeping the peace,
up in the sky or under water,
dressed up…
dressed down, OR…
barely dressed…
Phillip is funny and
great fun to be around.
A wonderful father,
an animal lover and protector,
a loving husband and great friend to all who know him, I am proud to be his wife, his lifelong partner, his other half.
I’m also proud to work together as co-hosts on our Live radio show, “Let’s Talk!” about Life, Love and Parenting archived on this site after each show for your listening convenience.
The Bright Spot 
– I could not think of a better person to take this life journey with! Take a moment to think of all the reasons you love your special someone and go give that person a big kiss! I’ve just finished this story and am looking for my Batman, my Caped Crusader, my darling to give him a big smooch! 😉 b
The 1-Eyed Teddy Bear
The point of this story need not identify of the owner of the 1-eyed teddy bear, but rather WHO this fellow is made all the difference in saving our son’s cuddly animals.
The man actually cannot be identified because he is a secret agent on a very significant level. He is close to our family and we all adore him but we keep conversation limited to family stuff, old friends, or school happenings. He signs his holiday envelopes as James Bond. It’s all very cool in a surreptitious kind of way, the “secret†in secret agent makes it sound so hush-hush, and the undercover missions we are never allowed to know about are wrapped in clandestine mystery. All very exciting, so what does this have to do with stuffed animals? 
Our eldest is a strapping 24-year-old dude with beer posters in his room and a steady girlfriend at the helm.
Rewind about 14 years and here was a kid with a ton of stuffed animals, some from babyhood, others won at the amusement park, many from the big glass box with the grabber handle thingie at the diner. An admirer of big cats, one of his favorite was a huge white tiger with sharp blue eyes.
For a long time, my husband felt our son needed to unload his cuddly animals. I’d protest seeing the quiet sadness in our child’s eyes. The subject came up at significant milestones, like award ceremonies, moving from elementary to middle school, etc. I understood my husband’s point of view: he wanted to make our son grow up, be a man, get tough. I understood my son’s point of view: at that time he was still an only child and he wasn’t ready.
Then one year we visited Washington, D.C. and James Bond invited us to stay in his hom
e. He was away, as usual, and he couldn’t say where he was, except that he would leave the key for us under the mat. Under the mat?!? He lives with all this enigmatic secrecy but leaves the house key under the mat!
It was very exciting to walk around his home. Medals, awards, Christmas cards from the presidents over the last 20 years, and as we walked upstairs to pick out our rooms for the night, there, in the middle of the master bedroom, sitting proudly atop the big bed, was a 1-eyed Steiff teddy bear with a worn nose, an untied yellow bow &Â fur so loved-off and cuddled, it was a treasure to behold.
It was also ammunition to ward off any more attempts to clear out stuffed animals from our son’s room. “If James Bond can keep his teddy bear, so can I!â€Â
So that was that. More than a decade’s passed and on his own, our son has donated his stuffed animals along the way – but that’s the important part of this story – it was on his terms, his timing and his choice of where they went. The huge white tiger is now the centerpiece & reading buddy in a fantastic enrichment school.
I never take anything from my children without asking them. Together we donate what they choose to give up when they choose to. It teaches them to let go, to give to others and to stay organized. (Little One sorting>>)
There is a marvelous organization called YoungLives which helps teenage mothers. Every 3rd Wednesday, the young mothers meet at a church in Norwalk, CT to learn about God and their children, plus, they can choose items they need that people have donated.
When our daughter was ready to donate her toys or princess dresses, etc., we would bring them to the church and she would see firsthand the children light up with joy as they picked
out what they would like. She saw a little   2-year-old boy dive into her Elmo chair exclaiming, “That’s mine, I love this chair!” And little girls picking out sparkly dresses. Or Barbies. Or unicorns.
The children were happy and it made our child well up with joy to see the kids’ faces light up while new life was instantly breathed into her cherished pieces. It deeply linked giving to pleasure. You can check out organizations in your area like YoungLives, Birthright, Hopeline or any organization that benefits a cause you believe in. We’ve also donated her crib, baby furniture and Pack-n-Plays.
Our daughter has given up lots of her cuddly animals, even packing & sending many huge boxes to Africa.
The Bright SpotTMÂ Â – The exciting thing about the missionary we shipped her stuffed animals to
 is that they sent back photos of orphan children cuddling her animals! A fine day, indeed. Again, on our children’s terms while reinforcing a life skill of giving as a pleasure.
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Our Son ~ I Blinked!
I’m afraid I blinked. 
Our son is a young man now, working in Manhattan & making plans for his future.
A dashing big brother & owner of fast cars (yes, that’s him driving his car).
Sharing some treasured memories of a time gone way too fast from polo to the Grand Canyon to England, Caribbean, Florida, Boy Scouts, VFMA, Essex & some of the best hair-dos with every accessory!
Yup, it’s clear, I blinked!
I’m so proud he’s grown into a wonderful young man with strong character.
To see more on this Superhero Big Brother, click these 2 stories:
A Foundation for Happy Siblings
and
The Bright Spot – The job of a parent is to love, nurture, teach and guide so our little ones become independent and loving, kind parents in their future. Please remember to stay in the moment because those moments are passing so quickly. Almost anything can be replaced except time: http://www.theletstalkmom.com/tea-talk-momversations/i-am-here-for-you/
